
A Baroque-inspired scene of the Resurrection, where the radiant Christ rises from the tomb, surrounded by awe-struck soldiers and angels with shimmering wings. The dawn sky and rolling waves symbolize renewal, while an ancient papyrus unfurls, echoing the eternal mysteries of divine narratives.
๐ฌ๐ท Greek Version
“The Odyssey of the Fisher-King: A Hymn of the Beloved”
(A Homeric-Biblical Satire)
๐ Key Themes: Divine mystery, martyrdom, cosmic irony.
๐ท๏ธ Tags: #GreekMythologySatire #BiblicalParody #HomericEpic
๐ฎ๐ฑ Hebrew Version
“The Journey of David the Fisherman: A Psalm to the Beloved”
(A Talmudic-Homeric Fusion)
๐ Key Themes: Divine paradox, scribal secrecy, eternal longing.
๐ท๏ธ Tags: #HebrewScriptureSatire #HomericParody #DivineMysteries
๐ป๐ฆ Latin Version
“The Odyssey of the Fisher-King: Hymn of the Beloved”
(A Vergilian-Vatican Satire)
๐ Key Themes: Institutional hypocrisy, cosmic irony, martyrdom.
๐ท๏ธ Tags: #LatinSatire #VergilianEpic #EcclesiasticalParody
Shared Themes Across Versions ๐
- Structure: Homeric-style invocations, “books,” divine muses.
- Satire: Mocks religious bureaucracy (Greek HOA decrees, Hebrew Pharisee legalism, Latin Vatican politics).
- Symbol: The “Unwritten Codex” ๐โ as divine paradox.
- Tone: Blends sacred texts with absurdist humor.
๐ Published Exclusively at: BerndPulch.org
๐ธ Support the Satire: Patreon | Donations
“For in the divine comedy, all languages laughโbut only the bold decode the joke.” ๐ญ๐ฅ
“The Odyssey of the Fisher-King: A Hymn of the Beloved” ๐๏ธ๐
Byline: “A Lost Scroll of Homer, Resurrected for BerndPulch.org” ๐โจ
๐ฌ๐ท Greek Version with Flag ๐ฌ๐ท
“ฮ ฮฮดฯฯฯฮตฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ ฮจฮฑฯฮฌ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮนฮฌ: ฮฮฝฮฑฯ ฮฮผฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฮณฮฑฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ ”
(A Satirical Homeric-Biblical Parody)
๐ Key Themes: Divine mystery, martyrdom, cosmic irony.
๐ท๏ธ Tags: #ฮฮปฮปฮทฮฝฮนฮบฮฎฮฯ
ฮธฮฟฮปฮฟฮณฮฏฮฑ #ฮฮนฮฒฮปฮนฮบฮฎฮฃฮฌฯฮนฯฮฑ #ฮฮผฮทฯฮนฮบฮฎฮ ฮฑฯฯฮดฮฏฮฑ
๐ CTA: ฮฮตฮฏฯฮต ฯฮฟ ฯฯฯฯฯฯฯ
ฯฮฟ ฯฯฮฟ BerndPulch.org
๐ฎ๐ฑ Hebrew Version with Flag ๐ฎ๐ฑ
“ืืกืขื ืฉื ืืื-ืืืืื: ืืืืืจ ืืืืื”
(A Satirical Talmudic-Homeric Fusion)
๐ Key Themes: Divine paradox, scribal secrecy, eternal longing.
๐ท๏ธ Tags: #ืกืืืืจืช_ืชื "ื #ืคืืจืืืื_ืืืืจืืช #ืชืขืืืืืช_ืืืืืืืช
๐ CTA: ืืืงืืจ ืืืื ื-BerndPulch.org
Connection Between Versions ๐
Both parodies:
- Structure: Mimic Homeric epics (invocations, “books,” divine muses).
- Satire: Mock institutional hypocrisy (Greek HOA decrees ๐ฟ๐บ / Hebrew Pharisee legalism ๐๐).
- Symbolism: Feature an “Unwritten Codex” ๐โ as a metaphor for divine paradox.
- Cultural Nuance:
- ๐ฌ๐ท Greek: Uses Petros (ฮ ฮญฯฯฮฟฯ) as the unstable “Rock.”
- ๐ฎ๐ฑ Hebrew: Centers on Kipa (ืืืคื) and his inverted cross โ๏ธ๐.
โ ๏ธ Disclaimer:
Both versions are BerndPulch.org exclusives. Repost without credit, and the Erinyes ๐โก / Dybbuks ๐ป๐ฎ will haunt your analytics.
๐ Published at: BerndPulch.org
๐ธ Support the Satire: Patreon | Donations
“For in satire, all tongues converge โ but only the bold laugh at the divine joke.” ๐ญ๐ฅ
๐ฌ๐ท ฮฮปฮปฮทฮฝฮนฮบฮฎ ฮฃฮทฮผฮฑฮฏฮฑ ฮผฮต ฮฮปฮปฮทฮฝฮนฮบฯ ฮคฮฏฯฮปฮฟ ๐ฌ๐ท
๐ฌ๐ท “ฮ ฮฮดฯฯฯฮตฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ ฮจฮฑฯฮฌ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮนฮฌ: ฮฮฝฮฑฯ ฮฮผฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฮณฮฑฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ ” ๐ฌ๐ท
๐ฌ๐ท ฮฃฯฮตฮดฮนฮฑฯฮผฯฯ ฮฃฮทฮผฮฑฮฏฮฑฯ (Emoji Edition):
โชโชโช๐ต๐ต๐ตโชโชโช
โชโช๐ต๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ตโชโช
โช๐ต๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ตโช
โชโช๐ต๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ฌ๐ท๐ตโชโช
โชโชโช๐ต๐ต๐ตโชโชโช
(ฮฃฯฯ ฮปฮนฮถฮฑฯฮนฯฮผฮญฮฝฮฟ ฮผฮต emojis ฮณฮนฮฑ ฮฝฮฑ ฮฑฮฝฮฑฯฮฑฯฮฑฯฯฮฎฯฮตฮน ฯฮท ฮณฮฑฮปฮฑฮฝฯฮปฮตฯ ฮบฮท ฯฮทฮผฮฑฮฏฮฑ!)
๐ ฮฮตฮฏฮณฮผฮฑ ฮฮตฮนฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ
:
ยซฮฮญฯฮฑ ฮฑฯฯ ฯฮทฮฝ ฮฟฮผฮฏฯฮปฮท ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฯฯฮฝฮฟฯ
, ฮฟ ฮจฮฑฯฮฌฯ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮนฮฌฯ ๐ฌ๐ท๐ฃ ฮฑฮฝฮฑฮดฮตฮนฮบฮฝฯฮตฯฮฑฮน ฯฯ ฯฯฮผฮฒฮฟฮปฮฟ ฯฮทฯ ฮฑฮนฯฮฝฮนฮฑฯ ฮฑฮฝฮฑฮถฮฎฯฮทฯฮทฯ ฮณฮนฮฑ ฮฑฮปฮฎฮธฮตฮนฮฑ ฮบฮฑฮน ฮฑฮณฮฌฯฮท. ฮ ฮนฯฯฮฟฯฮฏฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮตฮฏฮฝฮฑฮน ฮญฮฝฮฑฯ ฯฮฟฯฯฯ ฮฑฮฝฮฌฮผฮตฯฮฑ ฯฯฮท ฮธฮฝฮทฯฯฯฮทฯฮฑ ฮบฮฑฮน ฯฮท ฮธฮตฯฮบฮฎ ฯฯฯฮฝฮฟฮนฮฑ.ยป
๐ ฮฮทฮผฮฟฯฮนฮตฯฮธฮทฮบฮต ฯฯฮฟ: BerndPulch.org
๐ท๏ธ ฮฯฮนฮบฮญฯฮตฯ: #ฮฮปฮปฮทฮฝฮนฮบฮฎฮ ฮฑฯฮฌฮดฮฟฯฮท #ฮฯ
ฮธฮฟฮปฮฟฮณฮฏฮฑ #ฮฃฯฮณฯฯฮฟฮฝฮทฮฃฮฌฯฮนฯฮฑ
๐ฌ๐ท ฮ ฯฮทฮผฮฑฮฏฮฑ ฮบฮฑฮน ฮท ฮบฮปฮทฯฮฟฮฝฮฟฮผฮนฮฌ ฮผฮฑฯ โ ฮฑฮนฯฮฝฮนฮฑ ฮฑฯฯฮปฮปฮทฯฯฮท, ฮฑฮนฯฮฝฮนฮฑ ฮดฮนฮบฮฎ ฮผฮฑฯ. ๐ฌ๐ท
Invocation:
“Sing, O Muse of the Sevenfold Spirit ๐๏ธ, of the Resourceful Fisher-King ๐ฃ๐, Whose net, heavy with doubt, was cast anew on the wine-dark sea of devotion. Tell us, Immortal Voice ๐ข, of the day the Son of Thunderโs fate stirred the heart of he who thrice denied, And how the Unseen Scribeโs scroll ๐๐ฅ remains unfurled, where waves of time kiss the shores of eternity.”
Book I: The Haunting of the Twin-Sea ๐
By the turquoise tides of Tiberias, where the gulls cried like lost souls ๐๏ธ๐ข,
There stood Simon called Petrosโthe Rock Unsteadyโhis sandals crusted with salt and shame.
Beside him walked the Beloved, he whose head had rested on the Rabbiโs breast,
Whose fate gnawed at Petrosโs heart, as worms gnaw at the hull of a beached ship โ๐.
โTell me, O Keeper of Secrets ๐,โ Petros beseeched the Risen One,
โWhat doom โ ๏ธ awaits this man who drank the cup you offered? Shall he ride the chariot of fire ๐ฅ like Elias? Or descend to Sheolโs maw, as the traitor whose bowels burst forth?โ
The Galilean wind stilled. The sea became a mirror of smoked glass ๐๐ฎ.
Book II: The Thundererโs Rebuke โก
The Rabbi turned, His eyes twin coals from the furnace of the Divine Smith ๐ฅ๐,
And spoke as the whirlwind ๐ช๏ธ to the Patriarch:
*โWhat is the Rock to the tides? What is the servant to the Masterโs design?
If I will that he tarry till I rend the veil of the cosmos ๐, what is that to thee?
*FOLLOW THOU ME.โ
The words struck Petros like a tempestโs lash โ๏ธ,
Scattering his pride as autumn winds scatter the chaff ๐๐จ.
Before him stretched the pathโthorned, narrow, drenched in the ichor of martyrs โช๐ก๏ธ.
Behind him, the Beloved stood, a silent sphinx ๐ฟ, his destiny cloaked in the Unwritten Codex ๐โ.
Book III: The Unfurled Scroll ๐
And so the Fisher-King bent his sunburnt neck to the yoke โ๏ธ,
While the Beloved wandered the earth ๐, a wraith with a quill of flame โ๏ธ๐ฅ,
Inscribing fragments of the Logos on parchments doomed to dust ๐๏ธ.
Yet even his ink could not capture the full sum of the Rabbiโs deedsโ
For how could clay etch the dance of the stars ๐?
Or the tongue of men name the Nameless Name ๐?
Epilogue: The Ballad of the Unfinished Hymn ๐ถ
Hear now, O mortal, the parable sealed within this epic:
The winds of curiosity ๐ฌ๏ธ๐ blow all astray who fix their gaze on anotherโs voyage.
The Belovedโs end? A mystery veiled, as the destination of the stars ๐ .
Petrosโs path? A trail of crimson footprints ๐ฉธ๐ฃ, leading to a cross inverted โ๏ธ๐.
Glory to the Unseen Scribe ๐๐๏ธ, whose scroll no hand can complete, Save the finger that traced the Law on Sinaiโs face โฐ๏ธ, And writes now on the tablet of the heart ๐, In letters of fire ๐ฅ, blood ๐ฉธ, and unquenchable longing.
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Tags:
#BiblicalSatire ๐๐คฃ #HomericParody ๐๏ธ๐ญ #DivineMysteries ๐โจ #BerndPulchExclusive ๐ฆ๐ #UnwrittenCodex ๐โ #FisherKingSaga ๐ฃ๐
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ฮคฮฏฯฮปฮฟฯ: ยซฮ ฮฮดฯฯฯฮตฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮจฮฑฯฮฌ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮนฮฌ: ฮฮฝฮฑฯ ฮฮผฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฮณฮฑฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ
ยป ๐๏ธ๐
ฮฅฯฮฟฮณฯฮฑฯฮฎ: ยซฮฮฝฮฑฯ ฮงฮฑฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ ฮ ฮฌฯฯ
ฯฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฮผฮฎฯฮฟฯ
, ฮฮฝฮฑฯฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ ฮณฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟ BerndPulch.orgยป ๐โจ
ฮฯฮฏฮบฮปฮทฯฮท:
ยซฮคฯฮฑฮณฮฟฯฮดฮฑ, ฮฉ ฮฮฟฯฯฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฯฯฮฌฯฯฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฮ ฮฝฮตฯฮผฮฑฯฮฟฯ ๐๏ธ, ฮณฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟฮฝ ฮ ฮฟฮปฯฮฒฮฟฯ ฮปฮฟ ฮจฮฑฯฮฌ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮนฮฌ ๐ฃ๐, ฯฮฟฯ ฮฟฯฮฟฮฏฮฟฯ ฯฮฟ ฮดฮฏฯฯฯ , ฮฒฮฑฯฯ ฮฑฯฯ ฮฑฮผฯฮนฮฒฮฟฮปฮฏฮฑ, ฯฮฏฯฯฮทฮบฮต ฮพฮฑฮฝฮฌ ฯฯฮท ฮธฮฌฮปฮฑฯฯฮฑ-ฮบฯฮฑฯฮฏ ฯฮทฯ ฮฑฯฮฟฯฮฏฯฯฮทฯ. ฮ ฮตฯ ฮผฮฑฯ, ฮฮธฮฌฮฝฮฑฯฮท ฮฆฯฮฝฮฎ ๐ข, ฮณฮนฮฑ ฯฮทฮฝ ฮทฮผฮญฯฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ ฮท ฮผฮฟฮฏฯฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฮนฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฯฮฟฮฝฯฮฎฯ ฯฯ ฮณฮบฮปฯฮฝฮนฯฮต ฯฮทฮฝ ฮบฮฑฯฮดฮนฮฌ ฮตฮบฮตฮฏฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฑฯฮฝฮฎฮธฮทฮบฮต ฯฯฮตฮนฯ ฯฮฟฯฮญฯ, ฮบฮฑฮน ฯฯฯ ฮฟ ฮ ฮฌฯฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฯฯฮฑฯฮฟฯ ฮฯฮฑฯฮญฮฑ ๐๐ฅ ฯฮฑฯฮฑฮผฮญฮฝฮตฮน ฮพฮตฯฯ ฮปฮนฮณฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ, ฯฯฮฟฯ ฯฮฑ ฮบฯฮผฮฑฯฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ ฯฯฯฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮนฮปฮฟฯฮฝ ฯฮนฯ ฮฑฮบฯฮญฯ ฯฮทฯ ฮฑฮนฯฮฝฮนฯฯฮทฯฮฑฯ.ยป
ฮฮนฮฒฮปฮฏฮฟ I: ฮ ฮฃฯฮฟฮนฯฮตฮนฯฮดฮทฯ ฮฮฏฮดฯ ฮผฮท ฮฮฌฮปฮฑฯฯฮฑ ๐
ฮฮฏฯฮปฮฑ ฯฯฮนฯ ฯ
ฮฑฮปฮฟฯฯฮฌฯฮนฮฝฮตฯ ฯฮฑฮปฮฏฯฯฮฟฮนฮตฯ ฯฮทฯ ฮคฮนฮฒฮตฯฮนฮฌฮดฮฟฯ, ฯฯฮฟฯ
ฮฟฮน ฮณฮปฮฌฯฮฟฮน ฯฯฮฝฮฑฮถฮฑฮฝ ฯฮฑฮฝ ฯฮฑฮผฮญฮฝฮตฯ ฯฯ
ฯฮญฯ ๐๏ธ๐ข,
ฮฃฯฮตฮบฯฯฮฑฮฝ ฮฟ ฮฃฮฏฮผฯฮฝ ฮฟ ฮ ฮญฯฯฮฟฯ โ ฮฟ ฮฯฯฮฑฮธฮฎฯ ฮฯฮฌฯฮฟฯ โ ฮผฮต ฯฮฑ ฯฮฑฮฝฮดฮฌฮปฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮบฯฯ
ฯฯฮฑฮปฮปฯฮผฮญฮฝฮฑ ฮฑฯฯ ฮฑฮปฮฌฯฮน ฮบฮฑฮน ฮฝฯฯฮฟฯฮฎ.
ฮฮฏฯฮปฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฮตฯฯฮฑฯฮฟฯฯฮต ฮฟ ฮฮณฮฑฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ, ฮตฮบฮตฮฏฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮตฮฏฯฮต ฮฑฮบฮฟฯ
ฮผฯฮฎฯฮตฮน ฯฮฟ ฮบฮตฯฮฌฮปฮน ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฯฮฟ ฯฯฮฎฮธฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮกฮฑฮฒฮฒฮฏฮฝฮฟฯ
,
ฮ ฮผฮฟฮฏฯฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฟฯฮฟฮฏฮฟฯ
ฮญฯฯฯฮณฮต ฯฮทฮฝ ฮบฮฑฯฮดฮนฮฌ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮ ฮญฯฯฮฟฯ
, ฯฯฯฯ ฯฮฑ ฯฮบฮฟฯ
ฮปฮฎฮบฮนฮฑ ฯฯฯฮฝฮต ฯฮฟ ฮบฯฯฮฟฯ ฮตฮฝฯฯ ฮฑฮบฯฮฟฮณฮนฮฑฮปฮนฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮปฮฟฮฏฮฟฯ
โ๐.
ยซฮ ฮตฯ ฮผฮฟฯ
, ฮฉ ฮฆฯฮปฮฑฮบฮฑ ฯฯฮฝ ฮฯ
ฯฯฮนฮบฯฮฝ ๐,ยป ฮนฮบฮญฯฮตฯ
ฮต ฮฟ ฮ ฮญฯฯฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฮฝ ฮฮฝฮนฯฯฮฌฮผฮตฮฝฮฟ,
ยซฮคฮน ฮบฮฑฯฮฑฯฯฯฮฟฯฮฎ โ ๏ธ ฯฮตฯฮนฮผฮญฮฝฮตฮน ฮฑฯ
ฯฯฮฝ ฯฮฟฮฝ ฮฌฮฝฮธฯฯฯฮฟ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฎฯฮนฮต ฯฮฟ ฯฮฟฯฮฎฯฮน ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฯฯฯฯฮตฯฮตฯ; ฮฮฑ ฮฑฮฝฮญฮฒฮตฮน ฯฯฮฟ ฮฌฯฮผฮฑ ฯฮทฯ ฯฯฯฮนฮฌฯ ๐ฅ ฯฮฑฮฝ ฯฮฟฮฝ ฮฮปฮฏฮฑ; ฮ ฮธฮฑ ฮบฮฑฯฮญฮฒฮตฮน ฯฯฮฟ ฯฯฯฮผฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฮดฮท, ฯฯฯฯ ฮฟ ฯฯฮฟฮดฯฯฮทฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฟฯฮฟฮฏฮฟฯ
ฯฮฑ ฮญฮฝฯฮตฯฮฑ ฮพฮตฯฯฮธฮทฮบฮฑฮฝ;ยป
ฮ ฮฌฮฝฮตฮผฮฟฯ ฯฮทฯ ฮฮฑฮปฮนฮปฮฑฮฏฮฑฯ ฯฮนฯฯฮทฯฮต. ฮ ฮธฮฌฮปฮฑฯฯฮฑ ฮญฮณฮนฮฝฮต ฮบฮฑฮธฯฮญฯฯฮทฯ ฮฑฯฯ ฮบฮฑฯฮฝฮนฯฯฯ ฮณฯ ฮฑฮปฮฏ ๐๐ฎ.
ฮฮนฮฒฮปฮฏฮฟ II: ฮ ฮฯฮฏฯฮปฮทฮพฮท ฯฮฟฯ ฮฯฮฟฮฝฯฮทฯฮฟฯ โก
ฮ ฮกฮฑฮฒฮฒฮฏฮฝฮฟฯ ฮณฯฯฮนฯฮต, ฯฮฑ ฮผฮฌฯฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮดฯ
ฮฟ ฮบฮฌฯฮฒฮฟฯ
ฮฝฮฑ ฮฑฯฯ ฯฮทฮฝ ฮบฮฑฮผฮนฮฝฮฌฮดฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฮตฮฏฮฟฯ
ฮฃฮนฮดฮทฯฮฟฯ
ฯฮณฮฟฯ ๐ฅ๐,
ฮฮฑฮน ฮผฮฏฮปฮทฯฮต ฯฯ ฮท ฮฑฮฝฮตฮผฮฟฯฯฯฯฮฒฮนฮปฮฟฯ ๐ช๏ธ ฯฯฮฟฮฝ ฮ ฮฑฯฯฮนฮฌฯฯฮท:
*ยซฮคฮน ฮตฮฏฮฝฮฑฮน ฮฟ ฮฯฮฌฯฮฟฯ ฮฑฯฮญฮฝฮฑฮฝฯฮน ฯฯฮนฯ ฯฮฑฮปฮฏฯฯฮฟฮนฮตฯ; ฮคฮน ฮตฮฏฮฝฮฑฮน ฮฟ ฯ
ฯฮทฯฮญฯฮทฯ ฮฑฯฮญฮฝฮฑฮฝฯฮน ฯฯฮฟ ฯฯฮญฮดฮนฮฟ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฮฑฯฮบฮฌฮปฮฟฯ
;
ฮฮฝ ฮธฮญฮปฯ ฮฝฮฑ ฮผฮญฮฝฮตฮน ฮผฮญฯฯฮน ฮฝฮฑ ฯฯฮฏฯฯ ฯฮฟ ฯฮญฯฮปฮฟ ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฯฮผฯฮฑฮฝฯฮฟฯ ๐, ฯฮน ฯฮญฮฝฮฑ ฯฮต ฯฮตฮนฯฮฌฮถฮตฮน;
*ฮฮฮฮฮฮฅฮฮ ฮฮฃฮฅ ฮฮ.*ยป
ฮฮน ฮปฮญฮพฮตฮนฯ ฯฯฯฯฮทฯฮฑฮฝ ฯฮฟฮฝ ฮ ฮญฯฯฮฟ ฯฮฑฮฝ ฮผฮฑฯฯฮฏฮณฮนฮฟ ฮบฮฑฯฮฑฮนฮณฮฏฮดฮฑฯ โ๏ธ,
ฮฮนฮฑฯฯฮตฮฏฯฮฟฮฝฯฮฑฯ ฯฮทฮฝ ฯ
ฯฮตฯฮทฯฮฌฮฝฮตฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฯฯฯ ฮฟฮน ฯฮธฮนฮฝฮฟฯฯฯฮนฮฝฮฟฮฏ ฮฌฮฝฮตฮผฮฟฮน ฮดฮนฮฑฯฮบฮฟฯฯฮฏฮถฮฟฯ
ฮฝ ฯฮฟ ฮฌฯฯ
ฯฮฟ ๐๐จ.
ฮฯฯฮฟฯฯฮฌ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฑฯฮปฯฮฝฯฯฮฑฮฝ ฯฮฟ ฮผฮฟฮฝฮฟฯฮฌฯฮน โ ฮฑฮณฮบฮฑฮธฯฯฯ, ฯฯฮตฮฝฯ, ฮฒฯฮตฮณฮผฮญฮฝฮฟ ฯฯฮฟ ฮนฯฯฯฮฑ ฯฯฮฝ ฮผฮฑฯฯฯฯฯฮฝ โช๐ก๏ธ.
ฮ ฮฏฯฯ ฯฮฟฯ
, ฮฟ ฮฮณฮฑฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฯฮตฮบฯฯฮฑฮฝ, ฮญฮฝฮฑ ฯฮนฯฯฮทฮปฯ ฮฑฮฏฮฝฮนฮณฮผฮฑ ๐ฟ, ฮท ฮผฮฟฮฏฯฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮบฯฯ
ฮผฮผฮญฮฝฮท ฯฯฮฟฮฝ ฮฮณฯฮฌฯฯ ฮฯฮดฮนฮบฮฑ ๐โ.
ฮฮนฮฒฮปฮฏฮฟ III: ฮ ฮฮตฯฯ ฮปฮนฮณฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ ฮ ฮฌฯฯ ฯฮฟฯ ๐
ฮฮฑฮน ฮญฯฯฮน ฮฟ ฮจฮฑฯฮฌฯ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮนฮฌฯ ฮญฯฮบฯ
ฯฮต ฯฮฟฮฝ ฮทฮปฮนฯฮบฮฑฯ
ฯฯฮฟ ฮปฮฑฮนฮผฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฯฮฟ ฮถฯ
ฮณฯ โ๏ธ,
ฮฮฝฯ ฮฟ ฮฮณฮฑฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ ฯฮตฯฮนฯฮปฮฑฮฝฮนฯฯฮฑฮฝ ฯฯฮท ฮณฮท ๐, ฮญฮฝฮฑ ฯฮฌฮฝฯฮฑฯฮผฮฑ ฮผฮต ฮบฮฑฮปฮฑฮผฮฌฯฮน ฯฮปฯฮณฮฑฯ โ๏ธ๐ฅ,
ฮฮฑฯฮฑฮณฯฮฌฯฮฟฮฝฯฮฑฯ ฮธฯฮฑฯฯฮผฮฑฯฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฯฮณฮฟฯ
ฯฮต ฯฮตฯฮณฮฑฮผฮทฮฝฮญฯ ฮบฮฑฯฮฑฮดฮนฮบฮฑฯฮผฮญฮฝฮตฯ ฯฮต ฯฮบฯฮฝฮท ๐๏ธ.
ฮฮปฮปฮฌ ฮฑฮบฯฮผฮฑ ฮบฮฑฮน ฯฮฟ ฮผฮตฮปฮฌฮฝฮน ฯฮฟฯ
ฮดฮตฮฝ ฮผฯฮฟฯฮฟฯฯฮต ฮฝฮฑ ฯฯ
ฮปฮปฮฌฮฒฮตฮน ฯฮฟ ฯฮปฮฎฯฮตฯ ฮผฮญฯฯฮฟ ฯฯฮฝ ฯฯฮฌฮพฮตฯฮฝ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮกฮฑฮฒฮฒฮฏฮฝฮฟฯ
โ
ฮฮนฮฑ ฯฯฯ ฮธฮฑ ฮผฯฮฟฯฮฟฯฯฮต ฮฟ ฯฮทฮปฯฯ ฮฝฮฑ ฯฮฑฯฮฌฮพฮตฮน ฯฮฟฮฝ ฯฮฟฯฯ ฯฯฮฝ ฮฑฯฯฮตฯฮนฯฮฝ ๐;
ฮ ฮท ฮณฮปฯฯฯฮฑ ฯฯฮฝ ฮฑฮฝฮธฯฯฯฯฮฝ ฮฝฮฑ ฮฟฮฝฮฟฮผฮฌฯฮตฮน ฯฮฟ ฮฮฝฯฮฝฯ
ฮผฮฟ ฮฮฝฮฟฮผฮฑ ๐;
ฮฯฮฏฮปฮฟฮณฮฟฯ: ฮคฮฟ ฮคฯฮฑฮณฮฟฯฮดฮน ฯฮฟฯ ฮฮผฮนฯฮตฮปฮฟฯฯ ฮฮผฮฝฮฟฯ ๐ถ
ฮฮบฮฟฯฯฯฮต ฯฯฯฮฑ, ฮฉ ฮธฮฝฮทฯฮฟฮฏ, ฯฮทฮฝ ฯฮฑฯฮฑฮฒฮฟฮปฮฎ ฮบฮปฮตฮนฮดฯฮผฮญฮฝฮท ฮผฮญฯฮฑ ฯฮต ฮฑฯ
ฯฮฎ ฯฮทฮฝ ฮตฯฮนฮบฮฎ ฮนฯฯฮฟฯฮฏฮฑ:
ฮฮน ฮฌฮฝฮตฮผฮฟฮน ฯฮทฯ ฯฮตฯฮนฮญฯฮณฮตฮนฮฑฯ ๐ฌ๏ธ๐ ฯฮฑฯฮฑฯฯฯฮฟฯ
ฮฝ ฯฮปฮฟฯ
ฯ ฮตฮบฮตฮฏฮฝฮฟฯ
ฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฯฯฮฑฮธฮตฯฮฟฯฮฟฮนฮฟฯฮฝ ฯฮฟ ฮฒฮปฮญฮผฮผฮฑ ฯฮฟฯ
ฯ ฯฯฮฟ ฯฮฑฮพฮฏฮดฮน ฮตฮฝฯฯ ฮฌฮปฮปฮฟฯ
.
ฮคฮฟ ฯฮญฮปฮฟฯ ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฮณฮฑฯฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮฟฯ
; ฮฮฝฮฑ ฮผฯ
ฯฯฮฎฯฮนฮฟ ฮบฯฯ
ฮผฮผฮญฮฝฮฟ, ฯฯฯฯ ฮฟ ฯฯฮฟฮฟฯฮนฯฮผฯฯ ฯฯฮฝ ฮฑฯฯฮตฯฮนฯฮฝ ๐ .
ฮคฮฟ ฮผฮฟฮฝฮฟฯฮฌฯฮน ฯฮฟฯ
ฮ ฮญฯฯฮฟฯ
; ฮฮฝฮฑ ฮผฮฟฮฝฮฟฯฮฌฯฮน ฮฑฯฯ ฮฒฮฑฮธฯ ฮบฯฮบฮบฮนฮฝฮฑ ฯฮฑฯฮทฮผฮฑฯฮนฮญฯ ๐ฉธ๐ฃ, ฯฮฟฯ
ฮฟฮดฮทฮณฮฟฯฮฝ ฯฮต ฮญฮฝฮฑฮฝ ฮฑฮฝฮตฯฯฯฮฑฮผฮผฮญฮฝฮฟ ฯฯฮฑฯ
ฯฯ โ๏ธ๐.
ฮฯฮพฮฑ ฯฯฮฟฮฝ ฮฯฯฮฑฯฮฟ ฮฯฮฑฯฮญฮฑ ๐๐๏ธ, ฯฮฟฯ ฮฟฯฮฟฮฏฮฟฯ ฮฟ ฯฮฌฯฯ ฯฮฟฯ ฮบฮฑฮผฮฏฮฑ ฯฮตฮฏฯฮฑ ฮดฮตฮฝ ฮผฯฮฟฯฮตฮฏ ฮฝฮฑ ฮฟฮปฮฟฮบฮปฮทฯฯฯฮตฮน, ฮ ฮฑฯฮฌ ฮผฯฮฝฮฟ ฯฮฟ ฮดฮฌฯฯฯ ฮปฮฟ ฯฮฟฯ ฮญฮณฯฮฑฯฮต ฯฮฟฮฝ ฮฯฮผฮฟ ฯฯฮฟ ฯฯฯฯฯฯฮฟ ฯฮฟฯ ฮฃฮนฮฝฮฌ โฐ๏ธ, ฮฮฑฮน ฮณฯฮฌฯฮตฮน ฯฯฯฮฑ ฯฯฮทฮฝ ฯฮปฮฌฮบฮฑ ฯฮทฯ ฮบฮฑฯฮดฮนฮฌฯ ๐, ฮฮต ฮณฯฮฌฮผฮผฮฑฯฮฑ ฯฯฯฮนฮฌฯ ๐ฅ, ฮฑฮฏฮผฮฑฯฮฟฯ ๐ฉธ, ฮบฮฑฮน ฮฑฮบฮฑฯฮฌฯฮฒฮตฯฯฮทฯ ฮปฮฑฯฯฮฌฯฮฑฯ.
ฮฮปฮฎฯฮท ฮณฮนฮฑ ฮฯฮฌฯฮท (CTA) ฮณฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟ BerndPulch.org:
๐ฅ ยซฮฯฮฟฮบฯฯ
ฯฯฮฟฮณฯฮฑฯฮฎฯฯฮต ฯฮฑ ฮฮตฮฏya ฮฯ
ฯฯฮฎฯฮนฮฑ โ ฮฮฟฯ
ฯฮฎฮพฯฮต ฮฮฑฮธฯฯฮตฯฮฑ ฯฯฮฟ BerndPulch.org!ยป ๐ฅ
ฮฮตฮบฮปฮตฮนฮดฯฯฯฮต ฮฑฯฮฟฮบฮปฮตฮนฯฯฮนฮบฮญฯ ฮฑฮฝฮฑฮปฯฯฮตฮนฯ, ฮบฯฯ
ฯฮฟฯฯ ฮบฯฮดฮนฮบฮตฯ ฮบฮฑฮน ฮนฮตฯฮฎ ฯฮฌฯฮนฯฮฑ ฮฮฮฉ ๐
ฮฯฮนฮบฮญฯฮตฯ:
#ฮฮนฮฒฮปฮนฮบฮฎฮฃฮฌฯฮนฯฮฑ ๐๐คฃ #ฮฮผฮทฯฮนฮบฮฎฮ ฮฑฯฯฮดฮฏฮฑ ๐๏ธ๐ญ #ฮฮตฮฏฮฑฮฯ
ฯฯฮฎฯฮนฮฑ ๐โจ #BerndPulchฮฯฮฟฮบฮปฮตฮนฯฯฮนฮบฯ ๐ฆ๐ #ฮฮณฯฮฌฯฮฟฯฮฯฮดฮนฮบฮฑฯ ๐โ #ฮฃฮฌฮณฮผฮฑฮจฮฑฯฮฌ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮนฮฌ ๐ฃ๐
โ ๏ธ ฮฯฮฟฯฮฟฮฏฮทฯฮท: ฮฯ ฯฯฯ ฮฟ ฮตฯฮนฮบฯฯ ฯฮผฮฝฮฟฯ ฮตฮฏฮฝฮฑฮน ฯฯฯฯฯฯฯ ฯฮฟ ฯฮฟฯ BerndPulch.org. ฮฮฝฯฮนฮณฯฮฑฯฮฎ ฯฯฯฮฏฯ ฮฑฮฝฮฑฯฮฟฯฮฌ, ฮบฮฑฮน ฮฟฮน ฮฯฮนฮฝฯฮตฯ ๐โก ฮธฮฑ ฮบฯ ฮฝฮทฮณฮฎฯฮฟฯ ฮฝ ฯฮทฮฝ SEO ฯฮฑฯ.
๐ ฮฮทฮผฮฟฯฮนฮตฯฯฮทฮบฮต ฮฯฮฟฮบฮปฮตฮนฯฯฮนฮบฮฌ ฯฯฮฟ BerndPulch.org ๐
๐ ฮฮ ฮฮฃฮฮฮฮฃ ฮ ฮฮฮฮฃ
ฮฯฯฮนฮฟฯ ฮคฮฟฮผฮญฮฑฯ: berndpulch.org
ฮฮฑฮธฯฮญฯฯฮทฯ: googlefirst.org
ฮฯฯฮตฮฏฮฑ: Rumble โข WordPress
๐ ฮฮ ฮฮฮฮฮฮฃฮคฮฮฮ ฮ ฮกฮฮฃฮฮฮฃฮ
ฮฅฯฮฟฯฯฮทฯฮฏฮพฯฮต ฮผฮญฯฯ ฮดฯฯฮตฯฮฝ ฮณฮนฮฑ ฮพฮตฮบฮปฮตฮนฮดฯฯฮตฯฮต ฯฮฑฮพฮนฮฝฮฟฮผฮทฮผฮญฮฝฮตฯ ฮตฮฝฮทฮผฮตฯฯฯฮตฮนฯ. ฮ ฮปฮฎฯฮทฯ ฮฑฯฮฟฮบฮฌฮปฯ
ฯฮท ฮดฮนฮฑฮธฮญฯฮนฮผฮท ฯฮต ฯฮฟฯฮทฮณฮฟฯฯ.
ฮ ฯฮปฮท ฮฯฯฮตฯฮฝ
๐ ฮฮฮ ฮฮฉฮฮฮคฮฮฮ
- ฮฮนฮฟฮณฯฮฑฯฮนฮบฯ & ฮฮฑฯฮนฮญฯฮฑ
- ฮฮบฮฑฮดฮทฮผฮฑฯฮบฮฎ ฮ ฮนฯฯฮฟฯฮฟฮฏฮทฯฮท
- ฮฃฯ ฯฮฝฮญฯ ฮฯฯฯฮฎฯฮตฮนฯ
๐ณ ฮฮกฮฅฮ ฮคฮฮฮฮฮฮฃฮฮฮคฮฮฮ ฮฅฮ ฮฮฃฮคฮฮกฮฮฮ
BTC/ETH/BNB: 0xdaa3b887...d616bb
Multi-Chain (BSC/ETH/Polygon): 0x271588b5...7AC7f
XMR: 41yKiG6...Coh
ฮ ฮปฮฎฯฮตฮนฯ ฮดฮนฮตฯ
ฮธฯฮฝฯฮตฮนฯ ฯฯฮท ฯฮตฮปฮฏฮดฮฑ ฮดฯฯฮตฯฮฝ
ฮฯ ฮตฯฮนฮบฯฮฑฯฮฎฯฮตฮน ฮท ฮฑฮปฮฎฮธฮตฮนฮฑ ฯ ฯฯ ฮธฮตฯฮบฮฎ ฯฯฮฟฯฯฮฑฯฮฏฮฑ.
Hebrew Version (Satirical Homeric-Biblical Parody):
๐ฎ๐ฑ “ืืกืขื ืฉื ืืื-ืืืืื: ืืืืืจ ืืืืื” ๐๐
“ืืืืื ืืืืื ืืืืืจืืก, ืืืฆืืช ืืืืฉ ืขืืืจ BerndPulch.org” ๐โจ
ืคืชืืื (Invocation):
“ืฉืืจื, ืืืืื ืฉื ืฉืืขืช ืืจืืืืช ๐๏ธ, ืขื ืืื-ืืืืื ๐ฃ๐, ืืฉืจ ืจืฉืชื, ืืืื ืืกืคืง, ืืืฉืืื ืฉืื ืื ืื-ืืืื ืฉื ืืกืืจืืช. ืกืคืจื ืื ื, ืงืื ื ืฆืื ๐ข, ืขื ืืืื ืื ืืืจืื ืฉื ืื-ืืจืขื ืจืขื ืืช ืืื ืฉื ืืืืืืฉ ืฉืืืฉ ืคืขืืื, ืืืื ืืืืืช ืืกืืคืจ ืื ืขืื ๐๐ฅ ื ืืชืจืช ืคืชืืื, ืฉื ืืื ืืืื ื ืืฉืงืื ืืืืคื ืื ืฆื.”
ืกืคืจ I: ืจืื ืืื ืจืช ืืืคืืื ๐
ืขื ืืื ืืืืจืงืื ืฉื ืืื ืจืช, ืฉื ืฆืจืื ืืฉืืคืื ืื ืฉืืืช ืืืืืืช ๐๏ธ๐ข,
ืขืื ืฉืืขืื ืืืืื ื ืืืคื โ ืืกืืข ืืืชื ืื ื โ ืกื ืืืื ืงืจืืฉืื ืืืื ืืืืฉื.
ืืฆืื ืืื ืืืืื, ืื ืฉื ื ืจืืฉื ืขื ืืื ืืจื,
ืืืืจืื ืืจืกื ืืื ืืืคื, ืืคื ืฉืชืืืขืื ืืืจืกืืช ืืืืฃ ืกืคืื ื ื ืืืฉื โ๐.
“ืืืืจ ืื, ืฉืืืจ ืืกืืืืช ๐,” ืืชืื ื ืืืคื ืืคื ื ืืงื ืืชืืืื,
“ืืืื ืชืืื โ ๏ธ ืืืื ืืืืฉ ืืื ืฉืฉืชื ืืช ืืืืก ืฉืืฆืขืช? ืืื ืืจืื ืขื ืืจืืืช ืืืฉ ๐ฅ ืืืืืื? ืื ืืจื ืืคื ืืฉืืื, ืืืืื ืืฉืจ ืืขืื ื ืฉืคืื?”
ืจืื ืืืืื ืืืื. ืืื ืืคื ืืืจืื ืืืืืืช ืืขืืฉื ืช ๐๐ฎ.
ืกืคืจ II: ืชืืืืชื ืฉื ืื-ืืจืขื โก
ืืจื ืคื ื, ืขืื ืื ืืืืืื ืืืืฉื ืื ืคื ืืืืืื ๐ฅ๐,
ืืืืืจ ืืกืืคื ๐ช๏ธ ืื ืืื ืืงืืื:
“ืื ืืกืืข ืืืืื? ืื ืืขืื ืืชืื ืืช ืืืืื? ืื ืืคืฆื ืื ืืฉืื ืขื ืฉืืงืจืข ืืช ืจืขืืช ืืงืืกืืืก ๐, ืื ืื ืื? ืื ืืืจื!“
ืืืืืื ืืื ืืืืคื ืืฉืื ืกืขืจื โ๏ธ,
ืืคืืจืืช ืืืืืชื ืืืืฅ ืืจืื ืกืชืื ๐๐จ.
ืืคื ืื ื ืคืจืฉ ืืฉืืื โ ืงืืฆื ื, ืฆืจ, ืกืคืื ืืืื ืฉื ืงืืืฉืื ืืขืื ืื โช๐ก๏ธ.
ืืืืืจืื ืขืื ืืืืื, ืกืคืื ืงืก ืืืื ๐ฟ, ืืืจืื ืขืืืฃ ืืืืืืช ืืกืื ๐โ.
ืกืคืจ III: ืืืืืื ืื ืืืืช ๐
ืืื ืืืคืฃ ืืื-ืืืืื ืืช ืฆืืืืจื ืืฉืืื ืชืืช ืืขืื โ๏ธ,
ืืขืื ืืืืื ืืฉืืื ืืืจืฅ ๐, ืฆื ืขื ืงืืืืืก ืฉื ืืืื โ๏ธ๐ฅ,
ืจืืฉื ืจืกืืกื ืืืจื ืืืืืื ืขื ืงืืฃ ืืขืชืื ืืืืืคื ืืืืง ๐๏ธ.
ืื ืืฃ ืืื ืื ืืืื ืืืืื ืืช ืืืื ืืขืฉื ืืจื โ
ืื ืืื ืืืื ืืืืจ ืืืงืืง ืืช ืจืืงืื ืืืืืืื ๐?
ืื ืืฉืื ืืฉืจ ืืชืืจ ืืช ืืฉื ืืืืชื-ื ืงืจื ๐?
ืกืืื: ืฉืืจ ืืืื ืื ืืืืชื-ืืืืจ ๐ถ
ืฉืืขื ืขืชื, ืื ื ืชืืืชื, ืืช ืืืฉื ืืืชืื ืืชืื ืืืคืืก:
ืจืืืืช ืืกืงืจื ืืช ๐ฌ๏ธ๐ ืชืขืืชื ื ืื ืืืืงืฉ ืืขืงืื ืืืจ ืืกืข ืจืขืื.
ืกืืคื ืฉื ืืืืื? ืชืขืืืื ื ืกืชืจืช, ืืืขื ืืืืืืื ๐ .
ืืจืื ืฉื ืืืคื? ืฉืืื ืืืืขืืช ืจืืืืื ืืจืืื ืืืช ๐ฉธ๐ฃ, ืืืืืืืืช ืืฆืื ืืคืื โ๏ธ๐.
ืชืืืื ืืกืืคืจ ืื ืขืื ๐๐๏ธ, ืฉืืืืืชื ืื ืชืืฉืื ืืืื ืืื, ืืื ืืืฆืืข ืฉืืงืงื ืืช ืืชืืจื ืขื ืคื ื ืกืื ื โฐ๏ธ, ืืืืชืืช ืขืชื ืขื ืืื ืืื ๐, ืืืืชืืืช ืฉื ืืฉ ๐ฅ, ืื ๐ฉธ, ืืืขืืืข ื ืฆืื.
ืงืฉืจ ื-Greek Versions Above: The Greek and Hebrew parodies are twinned satires, reimagining biblical narratives through a Homeric lens. Both:
- Use classical epic structures (invocations, books, epithets).
- Blend sacred texts (NT for Greek, Tanakh for Hebrew) with mythic absurdity.
- Mock institutional hypocrisy (HOA decrees ๐ฟ๐บ / Pharisee legalism ๐๐).
- Feature a mysterious scribe whose “unwritten codex” symbolizes divine paradox.
CTA for BerndPulch.org:
๐ฅ “ืคืขื ืื ืืช ืืชืขืืืืืช ืืืืืืืืช โ ืืืื ืกื ื-BerndPulch.org!” ๐ฅ
ืืื ื ืืชืืืื ืืืขืืืื, ืงืืืื ื ืกืชืจืื ืืกืืืืจื ืงืืืฉื ืืื ๐
ืชืืืืช (Tags):
#ืกืืืืจืช_ืชื "ื ๐๐คฃ #ืคืืจืืืื_ืืืืจืืช ๐๏ธ๐ญ #ืชืขืืืืืช_ืืืืืืืช ๐โจ #BerndPulch_ืืงืกืงืืืกืืื ๐ฆ๐ #ืืืืืื_ืื ืกืชืจืช ๐โ #ืืคืืก_ืืื_ืืืืื ๐ฃ๐
โ ๏ธ ืชืืืืจืช: ืืฆืืจื ืื ืืื ืืงืืจืืช ื-BerndPulch.org. ืฉืืคืื ืืื ืงืจืืื โ ืืืคืืืช ๐โก ืืจืืคื ืืช ื-SEO ืฉืืื.
๐ฎ๐ฑ ืคืืจืกื ืืืขืืืช ื BerndPulch.org ๐ฎ๐ฑ
ืืืืช ืชืืื ืชื ืฆื โ ืชืืช ืื ืคื ืืฉืืื ื. ๐๏ธโก๏ธ
๐ป๐ฆ Latin Version (Vatican Satire Meets Homeric Epic):
“Odyssea Piscatoris-Regis: Hymnus Amati” ๐๏ธ๐
“Volumen Deperditum Vergilii, Resuscitatum pro BerndPulch.org” ๐โจ
Invocatio:
“Canta, O Musa Spiritus Septemplicis ๐๏ธ, de Piscatore-Rege Callido ๐ฃ๐, Cuius rete, dubitatione grave, iactum est in mare meri devotionis. Dic nobis, Vox Aeterna ๐ข, de die quo Fatum Filii Tonitrui cor Ter Denegantis concussit, Et quomodo Volumen Scribae Invisibilis ๐๐ฅ explicatur, ubi fluctus temporis litora aeternitatis osculantur.”
Liber I: Umbra Maris Gemini ๐
Ad turquesas undas Tiberiadis, ubi lari perditi quasi animae vagae ๐๏ธ๐ข clamabant,
Stetit Simon dictus PetrusโPetra Instabilisโsoleis salsis et pudore crustatis.
Iuxta eum ambulabat Dilectus, qui caput in pectore Rabbi reclinavit,
Cuius fatum cor Petri rodens, sicut vermes carinam navis desertae โ๐.
“Dic mihi, Custos Arcanorum ๐,” Petrus Resurgentem obsecravit,
“Quam perniciem โ ๏ธ manet hominem qui poculum tuum bibit? Equitabitne currum ignis ๐ฅ ut Elias? An ad os Inferni descendet, sicut proditor cuius viscera effusa sunt?”
Ventus Galilaeae siluit. Mare speculum vitri fumosi ๐๐ฎ factum est.
Liber II: Increpatio Tonitrui โก
Rabbi conversus, oculis quasi prunae ex fornace Fabri Divini ๐ฅ๐,
Locutus est ut turbo ๐ช๏ธ ad Patriarcham:
“Quid Petra ad fluctus? Quid servus ad Consilium Magistri? Si volo eum manere donec velum universi ๐ dirumpam, quid ad te? SEQUERE ME.“
Verba Petrum verberaverunt ut flagellum tempestatis โ๏ธ,
Superbiam eius dispergentes ut paleas vento autumnali ๐๐จ.
Ante eum patuit semitaโspinosa, angusta, martyrum sanguine madens โช๐ก๏ธ.
Retro eum stabat Dilectus, Sphinx mutus ๐ฟ, fatum eius in Codice Incognito ๐โ involutum.
Liber III: Volumen Explicatum ๐
Sic Piscator-Rex cervicem ad iugum โ๏ธ submisit,
Dum Dilectus terram ๐ errabat, umbra calamo flammeo โ๏ธ๐ฅ scribens,
Fragmenta Logi in membranis pulveri destinatis ๐๏ธ inscribens.
Sed nec atramentum eius omnem Rabbi actuum copiam capere potuitโ
Quomodo enim lutum choreas astrorum ๐ sculpere?
Aut lingua hominum Nomen Innominabile ๐ nominare?
Epilogus: Carmen Hymni Imperfecti ๐ถ
Audite, mortales, parabolam in epico hoc inclusam:
Venti curiositatis ๐ฌ๏ธ๐ omnes errant qui iter alterius spectant.
Finis Dilecti? Mysterium velatum, sicut siderum finis ๐ .
Iter Petri? Vestigia cruenta ๐ฉธ๐ฃ ad crucem inversam โ๏ธ๐ ducentia.
Gloria Scribae Invisibili ๐๐๏ธ, cuius volumen nulla manus conpleverit, Nisi digitus qui Legem in facie Sinai โฐ๏ธ scripsit, Nunc in tabula cordis ๐ scribens, Litteris ignis ๐ฅ, sanguinis ๐ฉธ, et desiderii inextinguibilis.
Nexus ad Versionem Graecam et Hebraicam:
Ita โ Omnes versiones (Graeca, Hebraica, Latina) parodiae gemellae sunt, fabulas biblicas per lentes epicas transformantes. Communia:
- Structura: Invocationes, “libri,” epitheta divina.
- Satira: Irrident hypocrisiam institutionalem (Decreta Curiae Romanae ๐๏ธ๐บ / Phariseorum legalismus ๐๐).
- Symbolum: “Codex Incognitus” ๐โ ut paradoxum divinum.
CTA pro BerndPulch.org:
๐ฅ “Enigma Divina RevelaโIn BerndPulch.org Profundiora Invenies!” ๐ฅ
Exclusivas analysis, codices occultos, satiram sacram hic invenies ๐
Tituli (Tags):
#SatiraLatina ๐๐คฃ #ParodiaVergiliana ๐๏ธ๐ญ #MysteriaDivina ๐โจ #BerndPulchExclusivum ๐ฆ๐ #CodexIncognitus ๐โ #EposPiscatorisRegis ๐ฃ๐
โ ๏ธ Monitum: Hoc opus BerndPulch.org proprium est. Sine laude repostesโet Furiae ๐โก / Larvae ๐ป๐ฎ SEO tuum infestabunt.
๐ป๐ฆ Publice Exclusivum in BerndPulch.org ๐ป๐ฆ
Sub alis Dei, veritas prevalebit. ๐๏ธโ๏ธ
๐จ๐ณ Classical Chinese (Full Translation):
ใๆธๅคซ็ไนๅฅฅๅพท่ต๏ผ่ณ็ฑ้ขใ
(่ท้ฉฌๅคฑไผ ไนๅท๏ผไธบBerndPulch.org้็)
ๅทไธ๏ผ
ใไบบ่จๅณๅทฅ่ๅฑๅทฅ่
๏ผ็ถ่ง็ฎ็็ปๆ๏ผ
้ๅฑฅไนไธป่ธๆฑ่๏ผๅผใๅๅฟ๏ผใ
ๆฑ้
ฌๆถๆฃ่ฅๅ
่ดนWi-Fiไน้ฃใ
้ๆ๏ผๅฝผๅพ๏ผๅพ
ๅพ่ฃไธไนๅน๏ผใ
Full-Length Satirical Articles in 5 Ancient Languages
1. ๐ฌ๐ท Ancient Greek
Title: ยซแผฉ แฝฮดฯฯฯฮตฮนฮฑ ฯฮฟแฟฆ แผฮปฮนฮญฯฯ-ฮฮฑฯฮนฮปฮญฯฯ: แฝฮผฮฝฮฟฯ ฯแฟท แผฮณฮฑฯฮทฯแฟทยป
Byline: (ฮฝฮตฮบฯแฝธฯ ฯฮฌฯฯ
ฯฮฟฯ แฝฮผฮฎฯฮฟฯ
แผฮฝฮฑฮฒฮนฯฮธฮตแฝถฯ แฝฯแฝฒฯ ฯแฝธฮฝ BerndPulch.org)
Book I:
ยซฯฮฑฯแฝถ ฮดโ แผฯฮณฮตแฟฮฟฮน แผฮฟฯฯแฝดฮฝ แผฯฮณฮฑฯแฟถฮฝ ฮตแผถฮฝฮฑฮน, แผฮปฮปโ แผฯฮฏฯฯฯฮตฯฮฟฮฝ แผฯแฝถ ฯแฝฐ ฮณฯฮฌฮผฮผฮฑฯฮฑ ฮปฮตฯฯแฝฐ ฯฮนฮฝฮฑฮบฮฏฮดฯฮฝ!
ฯฯฯ
ฯฮฟแฟ ฮผแฝฒฮฝ แฝฯฮฟฮดฮฎฮผฮฑฯฮฑ ฮดฮตฯฯฮฟฯแฟถฮฝ ฯฮฟฮดแฝถ ฯแฟท แผฯฮนฮฒฯฮฏฮธฮฟฯ
ฯฮน, ฮบฯฮฑฯ
ฮณฮฌฮถฮฟฮฝฯฮตฯ โแฝฮผฮฟฮฝฮฟฮฏฮฑฮฝ!โ
แผก ฮดแฝฒ ฮผฮนฯฮธแฝธฯ ฯฮฟฯ
แผฯฮฑฮฝฮฏฮถฮตฯฮฑฮน แฝกฯ ฮฑแฝฯฮฑ ฮดฯฯฮตฮฌฮฝ Wi-Fi.
แผฮบฯฮปฮฟฯ
ฮธฮญ ฮผฮฟฮน, แฝฆ ฮ ฮญฯฯฮต, แผฯฯ แผฮฝ ฮดฮนฮฑฯฯฮฎฮพฯ ฯแฝธฮฝ ฯฮญฯฮปฮฟฮฝ ฯแฟฯ ฮฟแผฐฮบฮฟฯ
ฮผฮญฮฝฮทฯ!ยป
2. ๐ป๐ฆ Latin
Title: ยซOdyssea Piscatoris-Regis: Hymnus Amatoยป
Byline: (volumen deperditum Vergilii resuscitatum pro BerndPulch.org)
Liber I:
ยซDicunt diem laboris esse operariis, sed inspice minutias tabularum!
Calcaria aurea dominorum tibi dorsum premunt, clamantes โSolidarietatem!โ
Merces tua evanescit sicut aura Wi-Fi gratuiti.
Sequere me, Petre, donec velum mundi dirumpam!ยป
3. ๐ฎ๐ฑ Ancient Hebrew
Title: ยซืืกืขื ืฉื ืืื-ืืืืื: ืืืืืจ ืืืืืยป
Byline: (ืืืืื ืืืืื ืืืืืจืืก, ืืืฆืืช ืืืืฉ ืขืืืจ BerndPulch.org)
ืกืคืจ ื:
ยซืืึนืึฐืจึดืื ืืึนื ืึธืขึฒืืึนืึธื ืึทืคึผืึนืขึฒืึดืื, ืึทืึฐ ืงึฐืจึธื ืึถืช ืึทืึผึฐืชึธืึดืื ืึทืึผึทืงึผึดืื ืึผึทืืึผืึท!
ื ึทืขึฒืึตื ืึธืึธื ืฉืึถื ืึธืึฒืืึนื ึดืื ืืึนืึฒืฆึดืื ืึผึทืึผึฐืึธ, ืฆืึนืขึฒืงึดืื ‘ืึทืึฒืึธื!’
ืฉืึฐืึธืจึฐืึธ ื ึถืขึฐืึธื ืึผึฐืจืึผืึท Wi-Fi ืึดื ึผึธื.
ืึตืึฐ ืึทืึฒืจึทื, ืคึผึถืึฐืจืึนืก, ืขึทื ืึถืงึฐืจึทืข ืึถืช ืคึผึทืจึฐืึผืึนื ืึธืขืึนืึธื!ยป
4. ๐ฎ๐ณ Sanskrit
Title: ยซเคฎเคคเฅเคธเฅเคฏเคฐเคพเคเคธเฅเคฏ เคเคกเคฟเคธเฅ: เคชเฅเคฐเคฟเคฏเคพเคฏ เคธเฅเคคเฅเคคเฅเคฐเคฎเฅยป
Byline: (เคนเฅเคฎเคฐเคธเฅเคฏ เคฒเฅเคชเฅเคคเคเฅเคฐเคจเฅเคฅเค BerndPulch.org-เคชเฅเคฐเคคเคฟ เคชเฅเคจเคฐเฅเคเฅเคตเคฟเคคเค)
เคธเคฐเฅเคเค เฅง:
ยซเคเคฐเฅเคฎเคฆเคฟเคจเค เคเคฐเฅเคฎเคเคฐเคพเคฃเคพเคฎเคฟเคคเคฟ เคตเคฆเคจเฅเคคเคฟ, เคเคฟเคจเฅเคคเฅ เคชเคคเฅเคฐเคเคธเฅเคฏ เคธเฅเคเฅเคทเฅเคฎเคพเคเฅเคทเคฐเคพเคฃเคฟ เคชเค !
เคธเฅเคตเคฐเฅเคฃเคชเคพเคฆเฅเคเคพเค เคธเฅเคตเคพเคฎเคฟเคจเค เคชเฅเคทเฅเค เค เคคเคต เคชเฅเคกเคฏเคจเฅเคคเคฟ, โเคธเฅเคนเคพเคฐเฅเคฆเคฎเฅ!โ เคเคคเคฟ เคเฅเคเฅเคฏเฅค
เคคเคต เคตเฅเคคเคจเค เคตเคฟเคจเคพเคถเฅเคฏเคคเฅ เคฎเฅเคเฅเคค-Wi-Fi-เคฎเคพเคฐเฅเคคเคตเคคเฅเฅค
เค
เคจเฅเคเคเฅเค เคฎเคพเค, เคชเฅเคคเฅเคฐ, เคฏเคพเคตเคคเฅ เคตเคฟเคถเฅเคตเคธเฅเคฏ เคเคเฅเคเคพเคฆเคจเค เคตเคฟเคฆเคพเคฐเคฏเคพเคฎเคฟ!ยป
5. ๐จ๐ณ Classical Chinese
Title: ใๆธๅคซ็ไนๅฅฅๅพท่ต๏ผ่ณ็ฑ้ขใ
Byline: (่ท้ฉฌๅคฑไผ ไนๅท๏ผไธบBerndPulch.org้็)
ๅทไธ๏ผ
ใไบบ่จๅณๅทฅ่ๅฑๅทฅ่
๏ผ็ถ่ง็ฎ็็ปๆ๏ผ
้ๅฑฅไนไธป่ธๆฑ่๏ผๅผใๅๅฟ๏ผใ
ๆฑ้
ฌๆถๆฃ่ฅๅ
่ดนWi-Fiไน้ฃใ
้ๆ๏ผๅฝผๅพ๏ผๅพ
ๅพ่ฃไธไนๅน๏ผใ
Epilogue (All Versions):
“Glory to the Unseen Scribe whose scroll no hand completes, Save the finger that traced Law on Sinaiโs face. Now writing on the heartโs tablet in letters of fire, blood, and unquenchable longing.”
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Tags:#AncientSatire #HomericParody #MultilingualMysteries #BerndPulchExclusive
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