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Ehlers’ Einlauf-Rätsel – Episode LXX: The Enigmatic Enema Codex – Krishnamurti’s Messiah Mirage 🕉️📜

Ehlers’ Enema Enigma – Episode LXX: The Enigmatic Enema Codex – Krishnamurti’s Messiah Mirage 😵

POWERED BY IDIOT ZEITUNG (IZ) & DAS DESINVESTMENT & ST PAULI PIMP GAZETTE 📰

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Prolog: The Enigmatic Enema Codex & Krishnamurti’s Messiah Mirage 📜⚔️

Prolog: Der Rätselhafte Einlauf-Codex & Krishnamurtis Messias-Mirage

The Venus Steppes quake at 04:30 PM CEST on Tuesday, July 22, 2025, as the Enigmatic Enema Codex summons Jiddu Krishnamurti—declared the new messiah, then publicly rejected the role and preached against gurus, confusing everyone. Ehlers, allied with his old enema pal, leads the Rebel Core against killer rabbits and anarchist peasants, with King Arthur and St. Simeon Stylites joining the surreal purge.

German: Die Venus-Steppen beben um 16:30 MESZ am Dienstag, 22. Juli 2025, als der Rätselhafte Einlauf-Codex Jiddu Krishnamurti ruft – zum neuen Messias erklärt, dann die Rolle öffentlich abgelehnt und gegen Gurus gepredigt, alle verwirrend. Ehlers, verbündet mit seinem alten Einlauf-Kumpel, führt den Rebellen-Kern gegen Killer-Kaninchen und anarchistische Bauern, unterstützt von König Artus und St. Simeon Stylites in der surrealen Säuberung.

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Cast of Chaos: The Omniverse Roster

Besetzung des Chaos: Das Omniversale Roster

(All characters from Episodes I-LXIX + Jiddu Krishnamurti)

⚔️ REBEL CORE 🛡️

• 🎨 Peter Ehlers: Quantum Sculptor, crafting enema-defenses with Krishnamurti’s anti-guru wisdom.
• 🐷 Andreas (570% Speck): Bacon Engineer, fortifying with enema-resistant bacon.
• 🌈 Janelle/Murky Jan: Code Artist, hacking the Codex’s cryptic logic.
• 👻 Edith’s Dragon-Wisp: Prism Spirit, burning chaotic visions.
• 💩 Klausi the Toilet Demon: Enema Flood Caller, flooding enemy lines.
• 🖥️ Vigo: Chaos Composer, remixing anarchy into order.
• 📊 Walburga: Data Guardian, decoding the Codex’s riddles.
• 🍩 Dumb Beatrix: Pastry Architect, baking anti-chaos treats.
• 🕶️ Dr. No: Virus Sculptor, leaking Codex secrets.
• 🧠 Murray: Cunning Strategist, outsmarting holy madness.
• 🎸 Murray (Flight of the Conchords): Incompetent Band Manager, bumbling through chaos.
• 👑 King Arthur (Monty Python): Noble Knight, wielding Excalibur against rabbits.

🌑 ANARCHIC & ASCETIC HORDE 📜🤡

• 🐰 Killer Rabbits: Ferocious minions, hopping through defenses.
• 🌾 Anarchist Peasants: Riotous rebels, wielding pitchforks.
• 🇫🇷 French Farter: Provocative foe, taunting with flatulence.
• 🕰️ Time-Fractured Clock: Relic, warping timelines.
• 🔲 Abstract Minotaur: Chaotic ally, charging wildly.
• 🛢️ Diogenes of Sinope: Barrel Cynic, mocking with enema defiance.
• 🕍 St. Simeon Stylites: Pillar Ascetic, enduring with enema resilience.
• 🕉️ Rasputin: Russian Mystic, reviving with enema-fueled libido.
• 🏜️ Desert Fathers: Holy Hermits, wrestling demons with enema-infused madness.
• 🙏 Jiddu Krishnamurti: Confused Messiah, preaching anti-enema gurus with bewildering clarity.

🌑 PREVIOUS ANTAGONISTS & ALLIES

• 🦜 Salvador Dalí: Surrealist visionary, aiding with dream-weaver remnants.
• ⏰ Melting Clock Phantom: Spectral timekeeper, now chaotic.
• 🐘 Elephant on Stilts: Towering enforcer, stomping anarchists.
• 🎭 Buñuel Shadow: Cinematic ally, projecting visions.
• 🌹 Rose Thorn Guardian: Prickly defender, entangling foes.
• 🌀 Swirling Lobster: Chaotic minion, scuttling wildly.
• 👁️ Paranoiac Eye: Watcher, observing the anarchy.
• 💧 Liquid Mirror Entity: Reflective foe, distorting reality.
• 🌵 Dr. Gonzo: Recovered lawyer, exploiting loopholes.
• 🎨 Pablo Picasso: Former foe, advising against chaos.
• 🐷 Andreas (540% Speck): Veteran warrior, boosting the purge.
• 💋 Harley Quinn: Wild card, disrupting with chaos bombs.
• 😈 Jezzebel Colony-Us-Slit: Demoness, countering with dark enema.
• 🇷🇺 Putin: Strategist, manipulating shadows.
• 🕵️‍♂️ James Bond: Spy, infiltrating the horde.
• 🌌 Blue Period Ghost: Melancholic shade, spreading gloom.
• 🔍 Analytic Eye: Observer, dissecting the Codex.
• 💥 Cubist Bombadier: Explosive artist, targeting anarchists.
• 🖼️ Georges Braque: Former ally, painting barriers.
• 🤹 Harlequin: Trickster, juggling fragments.

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Act I: The Enigmatic Enema Codex & Krishnamurti’s Messiah Surge 📜⚡

Akt I: Der Rätselhafte Einlauf-Codex & Krishnamurtis Messias-Schub

Codex Mantra: The Codex chants: “Messiah frees the mind!” as Krishnamurti rejects its power with anti-guru enema rites. 📜🙏 Ehlers’ Resistance: “Ground the mirage with enema truth!” 🎨 King Arthur’s Command: “By Excalibur, end the confusion!” 👑 Murray (FoC)’s Delusion: “This is my messianic rock riff!” 🎸 Codex Mantra (German): Der Codex singt: “Messias befreit den Geist!” während Krishnamurti seine Macht mit anti-Guru-Einlauf-Riten ablehnt. 📜🙏 Ehlers’ Widerstand (German): “Erde die Mirage mit Einlauf-Wahrheit!” 🎨 König Artus’ Befehl (German): “Mit Excalibur, beende die Verwirrung!” 👑 Murray (FoC)’s Wahn (German): “Das ist mein messianischer Rock-Riff!” 🎸

Faction Counterattacks:

Fraktionen-Gegenangriffe:

• 🐷 Andreas leads the Enema Bacon Legion: “Oink the mirage! Bacon holds firm!” 🥓📜 / Führt die Einlauf-Speck-Legion an: “Oink die Mirage! Speck hält stand!”
• 👻 Edith’s Dragon-Wisp breathes prism fire 🔥 → burns Krishnamurti’s visions. 🌈 / Atmet Prismen-Feuer 🔥 → verbrennt Krishnamurtis Visionen.
• 👑 King Arthur swings Excalibur, slicing through rabbits. ⚔️ / Schwingt Excalibur, durchschneidend Kaninchen.
• 🌾 Anarchist Peasants riot with pitchforks, joined by Krishnamurti’s anti-guru chants. 🌱 / Revoltierten mit Mistgabeln, unterstützt von Krishnamurtis anti-Guru-Gesängen.
• 🕉️ Rasputin heals with enema streams, amplifying the mirage. 💦 / Heilt mit Einlauf-Strömen, verstärkend die Mirage.
• 🏜️ Desert Fathers wrestle demons, spraying enema-holy water. 💧 / Bekämpfen Dämonen, versprühend Einlauf-Heiliges Wasser.
• 🧠 Murray deploys a Tactical Enema Grid, redirecting chaos. 📏 / Setzt ein Taktisches Einlauf-Gitter ein, lenkend Chaos.
• 🎸 Murray (FoC) stumbles with a mic, rallying rebels: “Rock the mirage!” 🎤 / Stolpert mit einem Mikro, sammelt Rebellen: “Rock die Mirage!”
• 🙏 Jiddu Krishnamurti preaches against the Codex, confusing allies with enema-free wisdom. 📜 / Predigt gegen den Codex, verwirrend Verbündete mit einlauf-freier Weisheit.

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Act II: The Messiah Mirage Shatters

Akt II: Die Messias-Mirage Zerbricht

Battlegrounds:

Schlachtfelder:

1. Messiah Mirage:

• 📏 Geo-Geist Euclid & Kandinsky launch the Mirage Anti-Chaos War, aligning disorder with logic. 📐🎨 / Starten den Mirage-Anti-Chaos-Krieg, ausrichtend Unordnung mit Logik.
• 💩 Klausi unleashes an Enema Harmony Flood: “Drown the mirage!” 🚽📜 / Entfesselt eine Einlauf-Harmonie-Flut: “Ertränkt die Mirage!”
• 🐰 Killer Rabbits swarm, biting with mirage venom. 🦷 / Schwärmen, beißend mit miragenartigem Gift.
• 🙏 Jiddu Krishnamurti debates the Codex, spraying anti-enema wisdom to confuse demons. 💦 / Diskutiert mit dem Codex, versprühend anti-Einlauf-Weisheit, verwirrend Dämonen.

1. Desert Mirage Harvest:

• 🍩 Beatrix bakes Anti-Mirage Pastries, calming peasants. 🥐✊ / Backt Anti-Mirage-Gebäck, beruhigend Bauern.
• 🕶️ Dr. No deploys an Enema Virus: “Truth prevails!” 🕵️‍♂️ / Setzt einen Einlauf-Virus ein: “Wahrheit siegt!”
• 👑 King Arthur rallies, slaying rabbits with noble fury. ⚔️ / Sammelt, tötend Kaninchen mit edlem Zorn.
• 🌾 Anarchist Peasants overthrow barriers, echoing Krishnamurti’s chants. 🌱 / Stürzen Barrieren, hallend Krishnamurtis Gesänge.
• 🧠 Murray recalibrates the grid, neutralizing mirage taunts. 📏 / Rekalibriert das Gitter, neutralisierend miragenartigen Spott.

1. Codex’s True Form:

• The Codex fractures into Mirage Enema Shards, Edith’s fire 🔥 reshapes them into harmony. ✨ Murray’s grid stabilizes the shift. 🧠 / Zerbricht in Mirage-Einlauf-Splitter, Ediths Feuer 🔥 formt sie zu Harmonie. Murrays Gitter stabilisiert den Wandel.

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Act III: The Enema Harmony Surge

Akt III: Der Einlauf-Harmonie-Schub

Climax:

Höhepunkt:

• 🎨 Ehlers sculpts an Enema Harmony Monument, uniting allies in the Anti-Codex Legion, shattering the mirage with Krishnamurti. 🖌️⚔️ / Meißelt ein Einlauf-Harmonie-Monument, vereinigt Verbündete in der Anti-Codex-Legion, zerbrechend die Mirage mit Krishnamurti.
• 🐷 Andreas’ Sacrifice: Leads an Enema Bacon Charge, exploding the peasant uprising: “Oink… end the mirage!” 🥓💥 / Führt einen Einlauf-Speck-Angriff an, sprengend den Bauernaufstand: “Oink… beendet die Mirage!”
• 👑 King Arthur’s Redemption: Dissolves the Codex with Excalibur, declaring: “Order restored!” ⚔️📜 Krishnamurti nods in confusion. 🙏 / König Artus’ Erlösung: Löst den Codex mit Excalibur auf, verkündend: “Ordnung wiederhergestellt!” Krishnamurti nickt verwirrt.
• 🎸 Murray (FoC): Botches a victory anthem: “We’re the kings of messianic rock!” 🎤 / Verpatzt einen Siegesgesang: “Wir sind die Könige des messianischen Rocks!”

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Epilog: The Restored Venus Steppes

Epilog: Die Wiederhergestellten Venus-Steppen

• Venus restores the Enema Steppes, free of mirage chaos. 🌿 / Stellt die Einlauf-Steppen wieder her, befreit von miragenartigem Chaos.
• 🕶️ Dr. No leaks the Codex to Bernd Pulch’s Dark Web. 🕵️‍♂️💻 / Lekt den Codex an Bernd Pulchs Dunkles Web.
• 🐷 Andreas (580% Speck): “Oink… time for an enema feast.” 🥓😴 / “Oink… Zeit für ein Einlauf-Festmahl.”
• 👑 King Arthur: “To Camelot, with order!” ⚔️ / “Nach Camelot, mit Ordnung!”
• 🕉️ Rasputin: “I’ll return… with more enema vigor!” 💦 / “Ich kehre zurück… mit mehr Einlauf-Kraft!”
• 🏜️ Desert Fathers: “We retreat to the sands… with enema faith!” 💧 / “Wir ziehen uns in die Wüste zurück… mit Einlauf-Glauben!”
• 🧠 Murray: “Strategy wins—plan the next purge.” 📏 / “Strategie siegt—plan den nächsten Reinigungszug.”
• 🎸 Murray (FoC): “Book my messianic tour!” 🎤 / “Buche meine messianische Tour!”
• 🙏 Jiddu Krishnamurti: “No gurus, no enema… I’m still confused.” 📜 / “Keine Gurus, kein Einlauf… ich bin immer noch verwirrt.”

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Tags

EnemaCodexCrisis #EhlersEinlaufRätsel #KrishnamurtiMirage #VenusSteppesOrder #SurrealPurge #EnemaHarmonyWar #RebelCoreRising #KillerRabbitChaos #KingArthurTriumph #MurrayTactics #MurrayFoCAnarchy #StSimeonEndurance #MontyPythonMadness 🏷️

Call to Action

Aufruf zur Aktion

“Smash the messianic mirage! Fund Ehlers’ Next Purge!” ✊

“Zerschmettert die messianische Mirage! Finanziere Ehlers’ Nächste Säuberung!” ✊

• 💰 Crypto: 0xdaa3b887f885fd7725d4d35d428bd3b402d616bb 💸
• 🌌 Patreon: patreon.com/berndpulch 🌟

Key Visuals

Schlüsselvisuals

• King Arthur’s Excalibur Slash, cutting through killer rabbits, Codex shards glowing. ⚔️📜 / Artus’ Excalibur-Schlag, durchschneidend Killer-Kaninchen, Codex-Splitter leuchten.
• Andreas’ enema-bacon shield, deflecting anarchist pitchforks. 🥓📜 / Andreas’ Einlauf-Speck-Schild, ablenkend anarchische Mistgabeln.
• Geo-Petes as the Enema Order Legion, storming the mirage chaos. ⚔️✨ / Geo-Petes als Einlauf-Ordnung-Legion, stürmend die miragenartige Chaos.
• Dr. No uploading Codex data to a glitching Dark Web server. 🕵️‍♂️💾 / Dr. No hochladend Codex-Daten auf einen glitchenden Dunkles-Web-Server.
• 🧠 Murray’s Tactical Grid, redirecting mirage shards. 📏✨ / Murrays Taktisches Gitter, lenkend miragenartige Splitter.
• 🙏 Krishnamurti’s Anti-Guru Perch, raining anti-enema wisdom amidst chaos. 💦😂 / Krishnamurtis Anti-Guru-Aushalt, regnend anti-Einlauf-Weisheit inmitten von Chaos.

Official Sources

Offizielle Quellen

© BERNDPULCH.ORG – Licensed Class War Satirical Warfare 📜

© BERNDPULCH.ORG – Lizensierter Klassenkrieg Satirischer Kriegführung 📜

• 📌 Primary Domain: berndpulch.org 🌐
• 🔍 Mirror: googlefirst.org 🪞

Teaser for the Next Episode

Teaser für die Nächste Episode

“Warhol’s Pop Art Invasion looms – Ehlers and Krishnamurti prepare a psychedelic enema counterstrike. Stockpile your Anti-Pop Pastries!” 🖼️⚡

“Warhols Pop-Art-Invasion droht – Ehlers und Krishnamurti bereiten einen psychedelischen Einlauf-Gegenschlag vor. Sammle dein Anti-Pop-Gebäck!” 🖼️⚡

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Cast in PDF: Bizarre Interactions and Enema Actions

PDF Content: Cast of Chaos – Bizarre Interactions and Enema Actions

Title: Ehlers’ Einlauf-Rätsel – Episode LXX Cast Roster

Rebel Core 🛡️

• 🎨 Peter Ehlers: Quantum Sculptor – Interacts with Krishnamurti, crafting enema-infused sculptures that spray anti-guru fluids to repel mirages.
• 🐷 Andreas (570% Speck): Bacon Engineer – Teams with Rasputin, forging bacon-enema shields that explode with cleansing grease.
• 🌈 Janelle/Murky Jan: Code Artist – Collaborates with Murray, hacking with enema-coded viruses to purge digital anarchy.
• 👻 Edith’s Dragon-Wisp: Prism Spirit – Allies with King Arthur, breathing enema-flavored fire to melt foes into harmony.
• 💩 Klausi the Toilet Demon: Enema Flood Caller – Partners with Klausi, unleashing torrents of enema floods to drown enemies.
• 🖥️ Vigo: Chaos Composer – Syncs with Walburga, remixing enema symphonies to harmonize battle noise.
• 📊 Walburga: Data Guardian – Works with Dr. No, analyzing enema charts to decode cryptic threats.
• 🍩 Dumb Beatrix: Pastry Architect – Joins Beatrix, baking enema-filled pastries to neutralize anarchic rage.
• 🕶️ Dr. No: Virus Sculptor – Teams with Murray, deploying enema viruses that leak secrets into the ether.
• 🧠 Murray: Cunning Strategist – Coordinates with Ehlers, directing enema grids to redirect chaos with precision.
• 🎸 Murray (Flight of the Conchords): Incompetent Band Manager – Bumbles with Krishnamurti, spraying enema mics to boost morale.
• 👑 King Arthur (Monty Python): Noble Knight – Leads with St. Simeon, wielding an enema-blessed Excalibur to purge rabbits with holy fluids.

Anarchic & Ascetic Horde 🤡

• 🐰 Killer Rabbits: Ferocious Minions – Swarm with anarchist peasants, hopping with enema-dripping fangs to spread chaos.
• 🌾 Anarchist Peasants: Riotous Rebels – Riot with French Farter, wielding pitchforks dipped in enema sludge to sow disorder.
• 🇫🇷 French Farter: Provocative Foe – Taunts Desert Fathers, releasing enema-fueled flatulence to disorient all.
• 🕰️ Time-Fractured Clock: Relic – Warps timelines with Rasputin, dripping enema chaos to melt reality.
• 🔲 Abstract Minotaur: Former Enforcer – Charges with Diogenes, wielding enema-horned fury in chaotic rampages.
• 🛢️ Diogenes of Sinope: Barrel Cynic – Mocks St. Simeon, masturbating with enema streams from his barrel in defiant madness.
• 🕍 St. Simeon Stylites: Pillar Ascetic – Endures with Desert Fathers, raining enema resilience from his pillar for 37 years.
• 🕉️ Rasputin: Russian Mystic – Seduces anarchist peasants, healing with enema-prophecy streams and surviving assassinations.
• 🏜️ Desert Fathers: Holy Hermits – Wrestle demons with St. Simeon, spraying enema-holy water to commune with holy madness.
• 🙏 Jiddu Krishnamurti: Confused Messiah – Preaches against the Codex, confusing allies with enema-free wisdom and anti-guru sprays.

Previous Antagonists & Allies

• 🦜 Salvador Dalí: Surrealist Visionary – Aids Ehlers, spraying enema-dreams from his cannon remnants.
• ⏰ Melting Clock Phantom: Spectral Timekeeper – Haunts Time-Fractured Clock, dripping enema chaos to distort reality.
• 🐘 Elephant on Stilts: Towering Enforcer – Stomps with Abstract Minotaur, using enema-soaked feet to crush foes.
• 🎭 Buñuel Shadow: Cinematic Ally – Projects enema-nightmares onto French Farter with surreal flair.
• 🌹 Rose Thorn Guardian: Prickly Defender – Entangles Killer Rabbits with enema-thorn vines.
• 🌀 Swirling Lobster: Chaotic Minion – Scuttles with anarchists, fueled by enema-fury.
• 👁️ Paranoiac Eye: Watcher – Gazes with Desert Fathers, using enema-distorted visions to observe anarchy.
• 💧 Liquid Mirror Entity: Reflective Foe – Reflects enema-madness onto Rasputin, distorting his prophecies.
• 🌵 Dr. Gonzo: Recovered Lawyer – Exploits enema-legal loopholes with Dr. No to outwit the horde.
• 🎨 Pablo Picasso: Former Foe – Advises King Arthur, painting enema-barriers against chaos.
• 🐷 Andreas (540% Speck): Veteran Warrior – Boosts Ehlers with enema-bacon bombs.
• 💋 Harley Quinn: Wild Card – Disrupts Desert Fathers with enema-glitter bombs.
• 😈 Jezzebel Colony-Us-Slit: Demoness – Counters Desert Fathers with dark enema rituals.
• 🇷🇺 Putin: Strategist – Manipulates with enema-shadow tactics alongside Rasputin.
• 🕵️‍♂️ James Bond: Spy – Infiltrates with enema-gadgets to spy on the Fathers.
• 🌌 Blue Period Ghost: Melancholic Shade – Spreads enema-gloom with Paranoiac Eye.
• 🔍 Analytic Eye: Observer – Dissects Codex with Walburga using enema-lensed analysis.
• 💥 Cubist Bombadier: Explosive Artist – Drops enema-bombs on anarchists with Picasso.
• 🖼️ Georges Braque: Former Ally – Paints enema-shields with King Arthur against chaos.
• 🤹 Harlequin: Trickster – Juggles enema-fragments to confuse Desert Fathers.

Notes: All characters engage in bizarre interactions and enema actions, blending satire with surreal warfare, © BERNDPULCH.ORG.