🚽 “2025 GLOBAL THRONES EXPOSÉ: What Really Goes Down in the World’s Most Powerful Bathrooms & Toilets” – A Disgustingly Revealing Satire by @BerndPulch

🚨 “2025 GLOBAL THRONE ROOM LEAK: What REALLY Happens When World Leaders ‘Go’ Behind Closed Doors”
An AI-Powered Satirical Exposé by @BerndPulch

💎 TOP 2025 BATHROOM REVELATIONS
Biden’s Bidet Blues: Confused by 200+ settings (just like foreign policy)
Putin’s Paranoia: Gold-plated toilet scans for poison (and truth)
Kim’s Upgrade: Nuke launch controls next to toilet paper holder
EU’s New Law: Standardized flush volume across all member states
Yelp Review: “1/5 stars – Democracy clearly doesn’t work here”

🔥
AI-Generated Shocker Images – See Zelensky live-streaming from bulletproof stall
2025 Predictions So Accurate They HurtTrump’s toilet sells NFT flushes
Global SchadenfreudeFinally see leaders equally vulnerable

👇 JOIN THE TOILET REVOLUTION
1️⃣ TAG a politician who needs bathroom sensitivity training
2️⃣ COMMENT which leader’s throne fits their personality
3️⃣ SHARE before they pass bathroom censorship laws
🔗 FULL UNCENSORED GALLERY


Twitter: “BREAKING: 2025 G7 bathroom summit leaks show…” [insert brutal one-liner]
Instagram: Carousel of AI throne designs with roast captions
Facebook: “Which world leader’s bathroom matches their governance?” poll
AI-generated 2025 world leaders’ luxury bathroom summit – hyper-realistic satire showing Biden, Putin, Kim and more in dysfunctional opulence”

📌 PINNED COMMENT
“DISCLAIMER: This is speculative satire about potential 2025 scenarios. All toilets shown are metaphorical (except maybe Kim’s). #NotFinancialAdvice”
TOP 2025 TAGS:
ToiletGate2025 #WorldLeaderRoast #BidetDiplomacy #EliteThrones #PoliticalSatire #AIArt #BerndPulch

💥 FINAL LINE:
“They think they rule the world… until the plumbing fails.”
SUPPORT UNCENSORED SATIRE
“Every donation is a plunger for truth.” 🪠✨

🇺🇸 WHITE HOUSE 2025 EDITION

  • Imaginary President Harris’ New Policy: Gender-neutral stalls with “equity flush pressure”
  • AI Toilet Assistant: “Hello Mr. President, your fiber intake suggests you’ll need 17 more minutes”
  • Classified Docs Scandal: Trump’s golden plunger discovered behind water heater

Yelp Review: “1/5 stars – Bidets now require facial recognition”


🇬🇧 BUCKINGHAM PALACE (Royal AI Upgrade)

  • King Charles III: Composting toilet tweets #SaveThePlanet after every use
  • Prince William: Practicing hologram speeches while seated
  • Harry & Meghan: Selling NFT toilet selfies from Montecito

Royal Announcement: “The Crown Jewels will now be 3D-printed for bathroom emergencies”


🇫🇷 ELYSÉE PALACE (Macron’s Final Days)

  • Legacy Project: $2M “European Unity Bidet” (only works with German-made parts)
  • Retirement Plan: Brigitte installing anti-aging toilet seat from Chinese investors
  • Far-Right Protest: Marine Le Pen demands French-only toilet paper

Le Menu: Macron’s tears now available in spray bottle (eau de regret)


🔥 2025’S MOST EXPLOSIVE THRONES

#5 KREMLIN (Putin’s Bunker Edition)

  • New Feature: Toilet drones to evade sanctions
  • Wagner Group Perk: Bloodstains count as patriotic decor

#10 PYONGYANG (Supreme Leader 4.0)

  • Kim Jong Un’s Upgrade: Toilet streams live missile tests
  • Citizen Belief: Dear Leader’s waste is collected as national treasure

#15 VATICAN (Pope Francis II Era)

  • Modernization: Confession app with sin-to-indulgence calculator
  • New Cardinal Rule: “No TikTok dances during ablutions”

#20 MAR-A-LAGO (Trump 2025 Relaunch)

  • VIP Perk: Golden toilets now accept Truth Social credits
  • Security Upgrade: All staff sworn in as “toilet election monitors”

#25 DOWNING STREET (Post-Sunak Era)

  • New PM’s First Act: Brexit-proof toilet paper supply
  • AI Assistant: “Would you like a cup of tea with your constitutional crisis?”

#30 BERLIN (Scholz’s Last Stand)

  • Coalition Toilet: Three parties, one flush consensus
  • Green Policy: Mandatory “climate guilt” after every flush

#35 OTTAWA (Trudeau’s Legacy)

  • Woke Upgrade: Toilet now apologizes when you sit down
  • Security Alert: Freedom Convoy protesters clogging all drains

#40 NEW DELHI (Modi’s Tech Hub)

  • Digital India: Toilet mines crypto between uses
  • Cultural Note: Bidet pressure matches monsoon intensity

#45 BEIJING (Xi’s Forever Reign)

  • Social Credit Boost: Public restroom access tied to loyalty score
  • New Feature: Toilet sings Communist Party hymns

#50 BRUSSELS (Von der Leyen’s Final Power Grab)

  • EU Regulation: Standardized flush volume across all member states
  • Bureaucrat Perk: Unlimited toilet breaks during sanctions meetings

👇 2025 ENGAGEMENT PROTOCOL

1️⃣ TAG a world leader who needs bathroom intervention
2️⃣ VOTE worst 2025 toilet upgrade
3️⃣ SHARE before they install thought-controlled bidets

🔗 FULL 2025 REPORT


⚡ 2025 VIRAL ELEMENTS

AI Integration: Smart toilets now gaslight users
Climate Angle: Carbon-neutral flushes for elites
War Tech: Ukrainian-designed toilet drones

ALT-TEXT: “2025 AI art of world leaders’ bathrooms – Harris’ equity bidet, Putin’s drone toilet, Kim’s live-stream throne. Satire about power and technology gone mad.”


📌 2025 DISCLAIMER

“This is speculative satire about potential 2025 scenarios. Any resemblance to actual bathroom policies is purely hilarious.” #NotFinancialAdvice

TOP 2025 TAGS:

ToiletGate2025 #GlobalThrones #BidetConspiracy #EliteFlush #BerndPulch


💥 FINAL 2025 WARNING:
“They monitor your searches – soon they’ll monitor your flushes.”

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“Every euro stops another elite golden toilet.” 🚽💎

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