---

🌟 EPISODE TITLE 🌟

“Dracula’s Neon Covenant – Blood Oaths & Glitter Revolt in the Shadow of the Carpathian Disco!” 🌌🦇

CLEARANCE LEVEL: 🩸 BLOOD-COSMIC // EYES ONLY
Declassification Status: 🚫 Classified // Forbidden to Mortals

---

🏰 THE SETTING 🏰

September 30, 2025 – Quasimodo’s shattered court festers under a crimson neon moon 🌕🔴. The Berghof ruins are rebuilt as Dracula’s Neon Carpathian Castle, its spires dripping LED blood 🩸💡 and Warhol’s soup cans repurposed as floating glitter-coffins 🥫⚰️. The Tower of Gay Pisa tilts under swarms of cyber-bats 🦇🤖, while Janelle’s throne is encircled by glitter-stake turrets ✨🔫. Báthory’s vampiric maidens merge with Dracula’s brides, their lace gowns glowing with neon fangs 👗🦷. A disco ball made from Pol Pot’s Year Zero skull pulses to synth-laced organ music 💀🎹.

---

📜 THE PREMISE 📜

Dracula, furious at Báthory’s defeat, forges a Neon Covenant ✍️🌈 to enslave Perverso under “Eternal Night Laws.” He resurrects Quasimodo as a zombified bailiff 🧟⚖️, chains Janelle in a coffin of Warholian soup cans 🥫⛓️, and enlists E.dith’s Trio Infernale as “blood accountants” 🧛♂️📉. Chaos erupts as glitter garlic bombs 🧄✨, vampire rave orgies 🎉🩸, and soup-can exsanguinators 🥫💉 clash. Moni accidentally swaps Dracula’s blood-wine with neon glitter 🍷✨, triggering a schism between undead purists and Janelle’s Fabulous Resistance 💅🔥.

---

🎭 FULL CHARACTER LIST (59 + NEW FACTION!) 🎭

1. Felix Dzerzhinsky 🧨👔 – Cheka founder, chained and ranting about “bourgeois trials.”
2. Genrikh Yagoda 🕴️📜 – NKVD head sneering, “I’ve survived worse courts.”
3. Nikolai Yezhov 😰⚰️ – Trembling, “Not another purge!”
4. Lavrentiy Beria 🕶️🔪 – Scheming to corrupt the trial.
5. Adolf (Surf Nazi Leader) 🏄♂️卐 – Shouting, “My waves defy laws!”
6. Surf Nazis 🌊🛹 – Neon-clad snowboarders chanting, “Surf free!”
7. Hinterfozzige Janelle 🐀👑 – KGB Super Vixen, snarling from a soup-can coffin.
8. Gay Ernst Röhm 🏳️🌈🛡️ – Smashing cyber-bats with a neon shield.
9. Gay K. Thorsten 🏋️♂️💥 – Flexing against vampire chains.
10. Divine 👹✨ – Hurling disco-ball stakes at undead brides.
11. John Waters 🎥🗑️ – Filming the chaos, “My grimmest masterpiece!”
12. E.dith von B.-Aumann-Stinkenstein 🕶️💼 – Plotting a “Stink Eternal” merger.
13. Herr Schildmeister 🧙♂️🔮 – Whispering cryptic rhymes about chaos.
14. Dumb Tom 🙄⛓️ – Dodging neon chains, “A trial? Great.”
15. Little Moni Penslut 🐀💣 – Tripping into Dracula’s wine cellar.
16. Dumb Beatrix 🧵😱 – Sewing “vampire-proof” cloaks in panic.
17. Crazy Pete 🤪💥 – Rigging garlic glitter bombs.
18. Stinky Stan 🤢🎛️ – Amplifying ABBA to shatter undead eardrums.
19. Pharaoh Kaiser L 👑🔮 – Chanting about the “Stink Eternal.”
20. Captain Mintz 👮♂️💣 – Purity-drilling vampire raves.
21. Stink-Gender Klaus 🏳️⚧️🥫 – Hiding in a soup can, torn between factions.
22. Rat-Queer Franz 🐀🏳️🌈 – Screaming, “Not my rats!” as bats swarm.
23. Tower-Kin Vixen 🏰🔀 – Torn between law and glitter rebellion.
24. Pope Alexander VI 👑✝️ – Scoffing, “I answer to God!”
25. Cesare Borgia 🖤🗡️ – Scheming to outwit Dracula.
26. Lucrezia Borgia 👗💋 – Batting eyelashes, “Surely I’m innocent?”
27. Juan Borgia 🍷🤤 – Drunk and slurring, “What laws?”
28. Judas Iscariot 💰🗡️ – Eastern overlord hissing, “Betrayal isn’t illegal!”
29. Caligula 🐎👑 – Demanding a “vampire orgy tax.”
30. Marquis de Sade 🖤⛓️ – Smirking, “This trial is delicious.”
31. Jeffrey Epstein 💼🔗 – Selling neon coffins on the dark web.
32. Andy Warhol 🥫🎨 – Painting “Undead Soup Cans.”
33. Drag Queen Liza 👠💎 – Stabbing vampires with sequin stakes.
34. Soup-Can Robots 🤖🥫 – Blasting Warhol’s voice, “15 minutes of justice!”
35. Glitter Cherubs 👼✨ – Dropping neon flares on the undead.
36. Gilles de Rais 🏰🔥 – Burning the plaza, “Flames cleanse all!”
37. Skeletal Knights 💀🛡️ – Chanting Latin curses in bone armor.
38. Demonic Hounds 👹🔥 – Muzzled but snarling at Dracula.
39. Tortured Spirits 👻🩸 – Wailing, “Justice for us!”
40. King Edward VII 🎩🍸 – Sipping tea, “How uncivilized.”
41. Aristocratic Dandies 🎩☕ – Mocking the trial’s “lack of decorum.”
42. Overfed Lords 🐷🍗 – Gorging on pheasant, “Spare us, hunchback!”
43. Champagne Footmen 🍾🥂 – Spraying bubbly, “Toast to freedom!”
44. Genghis Khan 🏹🌪️ – Roaring, “I bow to no court!”
45. Pol Pot 🥫☠️ – Enforcing “Year Zero Curfew” on vampires.
46. Khmer Enforcers ⚫🔗 – Shouting, “We reject your laws!”
47. Ideologue Scribes 📜✍️ – Allied with Quasimodo’s monks.
48. Wasteland Peasants 🌾🩸 – Chained blood thralls begging mercy.
49. High Scribe Malachai 📖👁️ – Defiant, “My prophecies defy you!”
50. Shadow Acolytes 🕳️🌑 – Whispering, “Chaos will prevail.”
51. Gloom Enforcers 🛡️⚔️ – Shackled zealots growling, “We make our own order!”
52. Elizabeth Báthory 👑🩸 – Betraying Dracula mid-bite.
53. Vampiric Maidens 👰♀️🧛 – Hissing, “We thirst for justice!”
54. Crimson Torturers 🎭⛓️ – Shackled, “We served the Countess!”
55. Quasimodo (Zombified) 🧟🔔 – Groaning, “Order… must… drain…”
56. Bell Enforcers ⚔️💡 – Chanting, “Judgment through neon!”
57. Scribe Monks 📜🙏 – Scribbling charges on glowing parchment.
58. Gargoyle Sentinels 🗿👁️ – Neon-eyed guards growling, “No escape!”
59. NEW FACTION: Dracula’s Coven 🧛♂️✨

• Dracula 🦇🌌 – Neon cape, glitter-dripping fangs.
• Undead Brides 👗💋 – TikTok-ing blood rituals in LED corsets.
• Blood DJs 🎧🩸 – Spinning coffin turntables.

---

🎬 THE PLOT 🎬

🧛 ACT I: BLOOD OATHS & SOUP-CAN COFFINS 🧛

Dracula descends in a neon bat-storm 🌪️🦇, sealing Janelle in a soup-can coffin 🥫⚰️. Báthory licks Warhol’s wig, purring, “Your art tastes… metallic.” Zombie Quasimodo tolls a skull-shaped bell 🔔💀, summoning cyber-bat drones 🤖🦇 that swarm Ernst’s harness.

Moni’s Blunder 🙈: Sneaking into Dracula’s crypt, she swaps his blood-wine with garlic glitter grenadine 🧄✨. He takes a sip and screeches, “THIS TASTES LIKE… RAINBOW VOMIT?!”

💃 ACT II: VAMPIRE RAVE ORGY 💃

Dracula transforms the plaza into a blood disco 🎶🩸, complete with coffin turntables and Báthory’s maidens twerking to synth-organ remixes. E.dith offers a “Stink Eternal merger” 🤝💨, but Caligula crashes the party demanding a “vampire orgy tax” 💸🍑.

Janelle’s Breakout 🔨✨: Using Liza’s sequin shiv 💎🔪, she stabs her coffin open and rides a soup-can robot into battle 🤖🥫, spraying garlic glitter from a Super Soaker 💦✨.

---

🌟 CLIMAX: BLOOD DISCO INFERNO 🌟

• Divine 👹: “Eat disco, Dracula!” Hurls a stake-shaped disco ball 💿🔪, impaling a vampire bride.
• Surf Nazis 🏄♂️卐: Snowboard over bat swarms, shouting, “Radical purge!”
• Moni’s Finale 🐀💥: Detonates a garlic glitter bomb 🧄💣, turning Dracula’s coven into sparkling statues ✨🗿.
• Báthory’s Betrayal 👑🔪: Drains Dracula mid-monologue. “Your plasma’s so 15th century.”

---

🎉 AFTERMATH 🎉

• Janelle 🐀👑: Mounts Dracula’s coffin throne. “Filth outlives fangs!”
• Warhol 🥫🎥: Livestreams the carnage. “Undead? More like underdressed.”
• Moni 🐀✨: Trips into a coffin, squeaking, “I’m a sparkle vampire now? Oops!”
• E.dith 🕶️🌪️: Flees with de Sade’s whip. “Next time… Frankenstein’s rave.”

---

📣 CALL TO ACTION 📣

💎 Support Janelle’s Glitter Crusade!

• Donate crypto to 0xdaa3b887f885fd7725d4d35d428bd3b402d616bb 💰🔗
• Join Patreon for classified garlic recipes: patreon.com/berndpulch 🧄📜
• Comment 🖋️: “What’s your vampire drag name?”

---

🏷️ TAGS 🏷️

dracula-covenant 🧛♂️✨ #eternal-night-laws 🌌🩸 #neon-blood-pact 💉🌈 #janelle-vs-undead 🐀⚔️🧛 #perverso-rising 🌟🔥 #bathorys-betrayal 👑🔪 #glitter-garlic ✨🧄 #zombie-quasimodo 🧟🔔 #vampire-rave 🎧🩸 #soup-can-coffins 🥫⚰️ #disco-stakes 💿🔪 #fab-resistance 💅✊ #blood-djs 🎶💉 #stink-eternal 💨👃

---

⚠️ ETHICAL NOTE ⚠️

Dracula, from Bram Stoker’s 1897 novel 🧛♂️📖, is reimagined as a neon tyrant critiquing toxic nostalgia. No actual vampires were glitter-bombed (they consented to the sparkle ✨🧛).

❌©BERNDPULCH.ORG – TOP-SECRET UNDEAD INTEL
ACT NOW – BEFORE THE COFFIN CLOSES.
“Chaos is eternal… and fabulous.” – Hinterfozzige Janelle 💋🔪

 OFFICIAL SOURCES
© BERNDPULCH.ORG – Licensed Intelligence Media 
 Primary Domain: [https://www.berndpulch.org](https://www.berndpulch.org) 
 Mirror: [https://googlefirst.org](https://googlefirst.org) 

 EXCLUSIVE ACCESS
Patrons/donors receive classified briefings. Act now for full disclosure. 

 CREDENTIALS
• [Bio & Career](https://berndpulch.org/about-me) 
• [Academic Verification](https://berndpulch.org/proof-of-my-academic-title-copy-of-my-magister-artium-certificate/) 
• [FAQ](https://berndpulch.org/faq) 

️ ARCHIVES
• [Rumble Video](https://rumble.com/v5ey0z9-327433077.html) 
• [WordPress](https://wp.me/P1k3PD-3N5D) 

 CRYPTO SUPPORT
BTC/ETH/BNB:

0xdaa3b887f885fd7725d4d35d428bd3b402d616bb

Multi-Chain (BSC/ETH/Polygon):

0x271588b52701Ae34dA9D4B31716Df2669237AC7f

Monero (XMR):

41yKiG6...Coh

*(Full address at [Donations](https://berndpulch.org/donations/))* 

 DIVINE PROTECTION
May truth prevail.