{"id":1004985,"date":"2026-08-18T04:52:13","date_gmt":"2026-08-18T08:52:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/?p=1004985"},"modified":"2026-09-09T04:53:11","modified_gmt":"2026-09-09T08:53:11","slug":"%f0%9f%92%a9-the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-sunken-city-takeover-esau-uses-the-gigantic-purple-enema-to-build-new-st-pauli-the-ultimate-competitor-to-new-york-%f0%9f%9f%a3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/2026\/08\/18\/%f0%9f%92%a9-the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-sunken-city-takeover-esau-uses-the-gigantic-purple-enema-to-build-new-st-pauli-the-ultimate-competitor-to-new-york-%f0%9f%9f%a3\/","title":{"rendered":"\ud83d\udca9 THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA \u2013 SUNKEN CITY TAKEOVER: ESAU USES THE GIGANTIC PURPLE ENEMA TO BUILD NEW ST. PAULI \u2013 THE ULTIMATE COMPETITOR TO NEW YORK! \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

“New York has skyscrapers. We have SPREADSHEETS.” \u2013 Esau Ehlers<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udcdc PROLOGUE \u2013 WHAT PREVIOUSLY HAPPENED (EPISODE 55)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Esau had assembled the most vicious naval villains in history. He had sailed to the Purple Sea. He had defeated the Jellyfish King. He had retrieved the Gigantic Purple Enema. All 102 characters rejoiced. The ultimate desinvestment tool was found. The cycle was complete. Or so they thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But as Esau held the Gigantic Purple Enema, a vision appeared before him. A sunken city \u2013 ancient, majestic, forgotten at the bottom of the ocean. It was Atlantis. And Esau saw it being transformed. Rebuilt. Renamed. New St. Pauli.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: “The enema… it’s showing me something. A city. A SUNKEN city. It wants me to rebuild it.” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\ude33<\/p>\n\n\n\n

SPREADSHEET ALIEN: “SCANNING… ATLANTIS DETECTED. DESINVESTMENT POTENTIAL: INFINITE. RECOMMENDATION: REBUILD AS NEW ST. PAULI. COMPETE WITH NEW YORK.” \ud83d\udc7d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: “New St. Pauli? Compete with New York? But… that’s impossible! New York is the greatest city in the world!” \ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

MARIA BATORY: (smirking) “Not for long, my love. We have the Gigantic Purple Enema. We have the Muchaverse. We have COLUMN 47.” \ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: (grinning) “You’re right. We will build New St. Pauli. The most absurd, chaotic, fabulous city in the multiverse. And we will compete with New York. We will DESINVEST the competition!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is Episode 56. The Sunken City Takeover.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udc65 COMPLETE CHARACTER LIST (EPISODE 56) \u2013 ALL ACTORS FROM ALL EPISODES + SUNKEN CITY CHARACTERS<\/p>\n\n\n\n

All previous characters return (see Episode 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54 & 55 lists) plus:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Character Actor \/ Persona Episode Origin
The Sunken City CGI \/ Voice NEW
King Atlas CGI \/ Voice NEW
Queen Meridia CGI \/ Voice NEW
The Submerged Skyscraper CGI NEW
The Coral Reeperbahn CGI NEW
New York Mayor Original (parody) NEW
Statue of Liberty CGI \/ Voice NEW
The Enema Construction Crew CGI NEW
Evil Esau Ehlers Lukas Ehrenberg (architect) All
Maria Batory Tilda Swinton \/ Cate Blanchett 48
Medusa (Original) Eva Green 46
Alphonse Sharkler Original (rehabilitated) 53
Heini Sharkler Original 49
Adolf Sharkler Original 34
Eva Sharkbrown Original 34
Captain LeChuck CGI \/ Voice 55
Black Caesar Original 55
Captain Nemo CGI \/ Voice 55
Long John Silver CGI \/ Voice 55
Barbarossa CGI \/ Voice 55
Captain Hook CGI \/ Voice 55
The Flying Dutchman CGI Ghost Ship 55
Skylla CGI \/ Voice 39
Charybdis CGI \/ Voice 39
Axel Springer Original 43\u201346
Henri Nannen Original 43\u201346
Gerd Bucerius Original 43\u201346
John Jahr Original 43\u201346
Captain Edward Smith Kenneth Branagh 51
Molly Brown Kathy Bates 51
J. Bruce Ismay Jonathan Hyde 51
Andrea Doris Maggie Smith 52
Captain Andrea Helen Mirren 52
First Mate Wilhelm Original 52
Printing Press Ghost CGI \/ Voice 52
Transgender Odysseus Evan Rachel Wood 41
The Sirens (3) CGI \/ Voice 40
Dr. Anthony Fauci Himself (parody) 40
Philo Johnson (The Frog) Jochen Brockmann 40
J\u00f6rmungandr CGI \/ Voice 38
The Kraken CGI \/ Voice 37
Leviathan CGI \/ Voice 36
Walt the Walrus CGI \/ Voice 35
Moby Dick CGI \/ Voice 34
Mack the Knife Original 34
The Dickies CGI army 34
Joker Himself All
M\u00f6win Herself All
Romy Haag Herself 14\u201346
Divine Divine (archival) 30\u201346
Spreadsheet Alien AI voice \/ CGI 6\u201346
Count Dracula Ralph Fiennes 9\u201346
Gina Wilde Original 15\u201346
HafenHure Original All
Gloria von Galaxy Original 11\u201346
Pamela Anderson Herself 7\u201346
Mamie Van Doren Herself 8\u201346
Jane Russell Herself (archival) 12\u201346
Zarah Leander Herself (archive) 13\u201346
Rosemarie Nittribit Original (ghost) 2\u201346
Klaus St\u00f6rtebeker Christoph Waltz 2, 15\u201346
Blackbeard CGI \/ Voice 17
Karl D\u00f6nitz Rainer Fassbinder 17
Alfred Nobel Stellan Skarsg\u00e5rd 18
Klabautermann CGI \/ Voice 20
Witch of St. Georg Meret Becker 21
Bloody Mary Tilda Swinton 24
Winifred Wagner Kate Winslet 25
Teresa Orlowski Herself 27
Nikita Khrushchev Simon Russell Beale 28
Marilyn Monroe Archival 29
Trans Schwanz Who Laughs Original 32
Bakunin Original All
Further Ehlers Original (ghost) 3\u201346
Frank Stonewall Original 5\u201346
Graf Thomas Original (94 tentacles) All
99 Schizo Petes 99 identical men 13\u201346
Pama Jim (Pete #47) Original 13\u201346
47 Bakunin Clones CGI army All
Lenin Parody \u2013 All
Stalin Parody \u2013 All
Walter \u2013 All
Genghis Khan Parody \u2013 All
Pol Pot Parody \u2013 All
Mun \u2013 All
Malte \u2013 All
Jagoda \u2013 All
Beria & The Big Hyena \u2013 All
Ugly Sven \u2013 All
The Uncles (Jochen et al.) \u2013 All
Ursila \u2013 All
Salome Sofia Tanz \u2013 All
Rosa Rosa Wachter \u2013 All
Pussy \u2013 All
The Mermaid \u2013 All
Kraken Jr. CGI 49
Leviathan Jr. CGI 49
Shark Army CGI 49
Stone Collectors CGI 50
Column 47 Jr. CGI Snake 50
Printing Press CGI 52
Jellyfish King CGI (defeated) 55
Gigantic Purple Enema CGI 55<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

\ud83c\udf0a THE SUNKEN CITY \u2013 ATLANTIS RISES<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Muchaverse descended into the depths. There, at the bottom of the ocean, lay Atlantis \u2013 ancient, majestic, covered in coral and forgotten history. But it was not dead. It was waiting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

KING ATLAS: (emerging from the ruins, glowing) “WHO DARES DISTURB THE REST OF ATLANTIS?!” \ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n

QUEEN MERIDIA: (emerging beside him, regal) “We have slept for millennia. Who awakens us?” \ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: (approaching, holding the Gigantic Purple Enema) “I am Esau Ehlers! I am the accountant of the Muchaverse! I have survived everything! I have the Gigantic Purple Enema! And I am here to REBUILD Atlantis! I am here to create NEW ST. PAULI!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

KING ATLAS: (shocked) “New St. Pauli?! You would rename Atlantis?! You would replace our ancient glory with… with KIEZ?!” \ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n

QUEEN MERIDIA: (intrigued) “Kiez? I have heard of this place. It is… fabulous?” \ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: “It is MORE than fabulous! It is the most absurd, chaotic, queer, spreadsheet-obsessed city in the multiverse! And I will build it on your ruins! With your blessing… or without!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

THE CONSTRUCTION \u2013 ESAU USES THE GIGANTIC PURPLE ENEMA \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd7\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Esau raised the Gigantic Purple Enema. It pulsed with power. Golden numbers shot from it, striking the ruins of Atlantis. The coral transformed into neon lights. The ancient columns became Reeperbahn signs. The ruins became fish markets and drag clubs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: “COLUMN 47 \u2013 CONSTRUCTION MODE ACTIVATED! ROW ATLANTIS \u2013 TRANSFORM INTO NEW ST. PAULI!” \ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The city began to rise. A Submerged Skyscraper emerged \u2013 made of glass, spreadsheets, and golden numbers. The Coral Reeperbahn glowed with neon. The Fish Market of Atlantis became the Kiez of the Sea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

SPREADSHEET ALIEN: “CONSTRUCTION PROGRESS: 47%. DESINVESTMENT MULTIPLIER: INFINITE. NEW ST. PAULI IS BORN.” \ud83d\udc7d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

THE COMPETITION \u2013 NEW YORK VS. NEW ST. PAULI \ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udfe3<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A dimensional portal opened. The Mayor of New York appeared, surrounded by skyscrapers, hot dog stands, and the Statue of Liberty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

NEW YORK MAYOR: (pointing) “WHAT IS THIS?! THIS… THIS PURPLE CITY?! IT IS A THREAT TO NEW YORK!” \ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

STATUE OF LIBERTY: (speaking) “I AM THE SYMBOL OF FREEDOM! THIS… THIS IS AN ENEMA!” \ud83d\uddfd<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: (smirking) “Yes! The Gigantic Purple Enema! And with it, I will build a city that competes with New York! A city of chaos! A city of spreadsheets! A city of LOVE!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

NEW YORK MAYOR: (furious) “NEW YORK IS THE GREATEST CITY IN THE WORLD! YOU CANNOT COMPETE!” \ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: “Watch me. Column 47 \u2013 COMPETITION MODE ACTIVATED! Row New York \u2013 DESINVESTED!” \ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Golden numbers shot toward New York. But instead of destroying it, they transformed it \u2013 adding purple neon lights, fishnets, and spreadsheets to the skyline.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

NEW YORK MAYOR: (horrified) “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! YOU… YOU MADE NEW YORK… FABULOUS!” \ud83d\udc85<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: “Yes. Because New York was always fabulous. It just needed a little… DESINVESTMENT.” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

ALL CHARACTERS REJOICE \u2013 THE FINAL CHORUS \ud83c\udfad\ud83c\udfaa<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EHLERS: (standing on the Submerged Skyscraper) “New St. Pauli is complete! The ultimate competitor to New York! The most absurd, chaotic, fabulous city in the multiverse!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

MARIA BATORY: (kissing him) “You did it, my love! You built a city!” \u2764\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

ROMY HAAG: (applauding) “New St. Pauli! I am the QUEEN of this city!” \ud83d\udc96<\/p>\n\n\n\n

DIVINE: (shrieking) “Honey, this city is FABULOUS! And I am the CEO of fabulous!” \ud83d\udc84<\/p>\n\n\n\n

KING ATLAS: (bowing) “Atlantis… has become… New St. Pauli. I am… proud.” \ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n

QUEEN MERIDIA: (smiling) “The ancient and the absurd… united.” \ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n

CAPTAIN LECHUCK: (voodoo dancing) “I love this city! It has zombies!” \ud83c\udff4\u200d\u2620\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

CAPTAIN NEMO: (nodding) “The sea has never seen such a city.” \ud83d\udea2<\/p>\n\n\n\n

LONG JOHN SILVER: (limping) “I found the treasure! It was the city!” \ud83e\udd9c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

CAPTAIN HOOK: (adjusting his hook) “Crocodiles would love this place!” \ud83c\udff4\u200d\u2620\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

THE FLYING DUTCHMAN: (creaking) “Even I am impressed!” \ud83d\udc7b<\/p>\n\n\n\n

SCYLLA: (six heads nodding) “I have six heads. All six say \u2013 NEW ST. PAULI IS THE BEST CITY EVER!” \ud83e\udd80<\/p>\n\n\n\n

CHARYBDIS: (whirling) “I have swallowed whole fleets. But I have NEVER swallowed a CITY!” \ud83c\udf0a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BAKUNIN: (exploding with joy) “ANARCHY! DESINVESTMENT! NEW ST. PAULI!” \ud83e\udde8<\/p>\n\n\n\n

GRAF THOMAS: (94 tentacles applauding) “I have 94 tentacles. You have 1 city. The city wins.” \ud83e\udd91<\/p>\n\n\n\n

JOKER: (laughing) “HAHAHA! A SUNKEN CITY! A PURPLE ENEMA! A COMPETITOR TO NEW YORK! BEST EPISODE EVER!” \ud83c\udccf<\/p>\n\n\n\n

M\u00d6WIN: (flying overhead, shitting golden sparkles) “I SHIT ON THE CITY! AND IT APPROVED!” \ud83d\udca9<\/p>\n\n\n\n

COLUMN 47 JR.: (hissing happily on Esau’s shoulder) \ud83d\udc0d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

FINAL TEXT ON BLACK: \ud83d\udda4<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u262d THE SUNKEN CITY TAKEOVER CONSPIRACY \u262d \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9<\/p>\n\n\n\n

ESAU USED THE GIGANTIC PURPLE ENEMA.
HE REBUILT ATLANTIS.
HE CREATED NEW ST. PAULI.
HE COMPETED WITH NEW YORK.
ALL 107 CHARACTERS RETURNED.
ALL ACTORS ASSEMBLED.
THE ULTIMATE CITY WAS BUILT.
THE CYCLE CONTINUES. WITH CITIES. WITH ENEMAS. WITH SPREADSHEETS. WITH SHIT.
FOREVER.
\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udc0d\ud83e\udd80\ud83c\udf0a\u2764\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

HASHTAGS FADE IN: \ud83c\udff7\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

SunkenCityTakeoverConspiracy #NewStPauli #AtlantisRebuilt #PurpleEnemaConstruction #CompetitorToNewYork #Column47Forever #All107Characters #EhlersSaga #IdiotZeitung #SubmergedCity #UltimateDesinvestment #DieB\u00f6seEsauEhlersEinlaufSaga<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

[END OF EPISODE 56] \ud83c\udfac\ud83c\udf7f\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

ST. PAULI-AT, JAHR NULL + 79 \u2013 THE SUNKEN CITY TAKEOVER CONSPIRACY \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The cycle continues. With cities. With enemas. With spreadsheets. With shit. Forever.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udc0d\ud83e\udd80\ud83c\udf0a\u2764\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

Authors: Dr. Helga Schei\u00dfefurz, Prof. em. Klistier von Hinten, Mag. D\u00e4mlich D\u00fcmmlich, Dr. h.c. Spreadsheet McExcel<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Executive Producers: M\u00f6win, The Joker, Esau (architect), Maria Batory, Medusa, Romy Haag, Divine, King Atlas, Queen Meridia, New York Mayor, and all previous.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Special thanks: The 99 Schizo Petes (for construction shanties), Homer (for the epic vibe), and every seagull who shat on the city.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

Bernd Pulch (M.A.) \u2013 forensic expert, founder of Aristotle AI, political commentator, satirist. Full bio \u2192 | Support the investigation \u2192<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udc4d LIKE | \ud83d\udcac COMMENT | \ud83d\udd14 SUBSCRIBE<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udcfa YouTube: youtube.com\/@bernd_pulch
\ud83d\udc26 X (Twitter): x.com\/berndsocial1
\ud83d\udce2 Telegram: t.me\/ABOVETOPSECRETXXL
\ud83d\udd13 UNLOCK THE TRUTH: berndpulch.org\/join<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA \u2013 CONTINUES… \ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83c\udde9\ud83c\uddea DIE B\u00d6SE ESAU EHLERS EINLAUF-SAGA \u2013 SUNKEN CITY \u00dcBERNAHME: ESAU NUTZT DEN GIGANTISCHEN LILA EINLAUF, UM NEU-ST. PAULI ZU BAUEN \u2013 DEN ULTIMATIVEN KONKURRENTEN ZU NEW YORK! \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9

“New York hat Wolkenkratzer. Wir haben TABELLEN.” \u2013 Esau Ehlers

—

\ud83d\udcdc PROLOG \u2013 WAS BISHER GESCHAH (EPISODE 55)

Esau hatte die abscheulichsten See-Villains der Geschichte zusammengebracht. Er war zum Lila Meer gesegelt. Er hatte den Quallenk\u00f6nig besiegt. Er hatte den Gigantischen Lila Einlauf geborgen. Alle 102 Charaktere jubelten. Das ultimative Desinvestment-Werkzeug war gefunden. Der Kreislauf war vollendet. Oder so dachten sie.

Doch als Esau den Gigantischen Lila Einlauf hielt, erschien eine Vision vor ihm. Eine versunkene Stadt \u2013 uralt, majest\u00e4tisch, vergessen am Grund des Ozeans. Es war Atlantis. Und Esau sah, wie sie verwandelt wurde. Wiederaufgebaut. Umbenannt. Neu-St. Pauli.

EHLERS: “Der Einlauf… er zeigt mir etwas. Eine Stadt. Eine VERSUNKENE Stadt. Er will, dass ich sie wieder aufbaue.” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\ude33

SPREADSHEET-ALIEN: “SUCHE… ATLANTIS ERKANNT. DESINVESTMENT-POTENZIAL: UNENDLICH. EMPFEHLUNG: WIEDERAUFBAU ALS NEU-ST. PAULI. KONKURRENZ ZU NEW YORK.” \ud83d\udc7d

EHLERS: “Neu-St. Pauli? Mit New York konkurrieren? Aber… das ist unm\u00f6glich! New York ist die gr\u00f6\u00dfte Stadt der Welt!” \ud83d\udcca

MARIA BATORY: (grinsend) “Nicht mehr lange, meine Liebe. Wir haben den Gigantischen Lila Einlauf. Wir haben das Muchaverse. Wir haben SPALTE 47.” \ud83d\udc51

EHLERS: (grinsend) “Du hast recht. Wir werden Neu-St. Pauli bauen. Die absurdeste, chaotischste, fabelhafteste Stadt im Multiversum. Und wir werden mit New York konkurrieren. Wir werden den Wettbewerb DESINVESTIEREN!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca

Dies ist Episode 56. Die Sunken City-\u00dcbernahme.

—

\ud83d\udc65 VOLLST\u00c4NDIGE CHARAKTERLISTE (EPISODE 56) \u2013 ALLE SCHAUSPIELER AUS ALLEN EPISODEN + SUNKEN CITY-CHARAKTERE

Alle vorherigen Charaktere kehren zur\u00fcck (siehe Episode 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54 & 55-Listen) plus:

Charakter Schauspieler \/ Persona Episoden-Ursprung
Die Versunkene Stadt CGI \/ Stimme NEU
K\u00f6nig Atlas CGI \/ Stimme NEU
K\u00f6nigin Meridia CGI \/ Stimme NEU
Der Unterwasser-Wolkenkratzer CGI NEU
Die Korallen-Reeperbahn CGI NEU
New Yorker B\u00fcrgermeister Original (Parodie) NEU
Freiheitsstatue CGI \/ Stimme NEU
Die Einlauf-Bau-Crew CGI NEU
B\u00f6ser Esau Ehlers Lukas Ehrenberg (Architekt) Alle
Maria Batory Tilda Swinton \/ Cate Blanchett 48
Medusa (Original) Eva Green 46
Alphonse Sharkler Original (rehabilitiert) 53
Heini Sharkler Original 49
Adolf Sharkler Original 34
Eva Sharkbrown Original 34
Kapit\u00e4n LeChuck CGI \/ Stimme 55
Black Caesar Original 55
Kapit\u00e4n Nemo CGI \/ Stimme 55
Long John Silver CGI \/ Stimme 55
Barbarossa CGI \/ Stimme 55
Kapit\u00e4n Hook CGI \/ Stimme 55
Der Fliegende Holl\u00e4nder CGI-Geisterschiff 55
Skylla CGI \/ Stimme 39
Charybdis CGI \/ Stimme 39
Axel Springer Original 43\u201346
Henri Nannen Original 43\u201346
Gerd Bucerius Original 43\u201346
John Jahr Original 43\u201346
Kapit\u00e4n Edward Smith Kenneth Branagh 51
Molly Brown Kathy Bates 51
J. Bruce Ismay Jonathan Hyde 51
Andrea Doris Maggie Smith 52
Kapit\u00e4n Andrea Helen Mirren 52
Erster Offizier Wilhelm Original 52
Druckmaschinen-Geist CGI \/ Stimme 52
Transgender Odysseus Evan Rachel Wood 41
Die Sirenen (3) CGI \/ Stimme 40
Dr. Anthony Fauci Himself (Parodie) 40
Philo Johnson (Der Frosch) Jochen Brockmann 40
J\u00f6rmungandr CGI \/ Stimme 38
Der Kraken CGI \/ Stimme 37
Leviathan CGI \/ Stimme 36
Walt das Walross CGI \/ Stimme 35
Moby Dick CGI \/ Stimme 34
Mackie Messer Original 34
Die Dickies CGI-Armee 34
Joker Himself Alle
M\u00f6win Herself Alle
Romy Haag Herself 14\u201346
Divine Divine (Archiv) 30\u201346
Spreadsheet-Alien KI-Stimme \/ CGI 6\u201346
Graf Dracula Ralph Fiennes 9\u201346
Gina Wilde Original 15\u201346
HafenHure Original Alle
Gloria von Galaxy Original 11\u201346
Pamela Anderson Herself 7\u201346
Mamie Van Doren Herself 8\u201346
Jane Russell Herself (Archiv) 12\u201346
Zarah Leander Herself (Archiv) 13\u201346
Rosemarie Nittribit Original (Geist) 2\u201346
Klaus St\u00f6rtebeker Christoph Waltz 2, 15\u201346
Blackbeard CGI \/ Stimme 17
Karl D\u00f6nitz Rainer Fassbinder 17
Alfred Nobel Stellan Skarsg\u00e5rd 18
Klabautermann CGI \/ Stimme 20
Hexe von St. Georg Meret Becker 21
Bloody Mary Tilda Swinton 24
Winifred Wagner Kate Winslet 25
Teresa Orlowski Herself 27
Nikita Chruschtschow Simon Russell Beale 28
Marilyn Monroe Archiv 29
Trans Schwanz Who Laughs Original 32
Bakunin Original Alle
Further Ehlers Original (Geist) 3\u201346
Frank Stonewall Original 5\u201346
Graf Thomas Original (94 Tentakel) Alle
99 Schizo Petes 99 identische M\u00e4nner 13\u201346
Pama Jim (Pete #47) Original 13\u201346
47 Bakunin-Klone CGI-Armee Alle
Lenin-Parodie \u2013 Alle
Stalin-Parodie \u2013 Alle
Walter \u2013 Alle
Dschingis Khan-Parodie \u2013 Alle
Pol Pot-Parodie \u2013 Alle
Mun \u2013 Alle
Malte \u2013 Alle
Jagoda \u2013 Alle
Beria & Die gro\u00dfe Hy\u00e4ne \u2013 Alle
H\u00e4sslicher Sven \u2013 Alle
Die Onkel (Jochen et al.) \u2013 Alle
Ursila \u2013 Alle
Salome Sofia Tanz \u2013 Alle
Rosa Rosa Wachter \u2013 Alle
Pussy \u2013 Alle
Die Meerjungfrau \u2013 Alle
Kraken Jr. CGI 49
Leviathan Jr. CGI 49
Haier-Armee CGI 49
Steinsammler CGI 50
Spalte 47 Jr. CGI-Schlange 50
Druckmaschine CGI 52
Quallenk\u00f6nig CGI (besiegt) 55
Gigantischer Lila Einlauf CGI 55

—

\ud83c\udf0a DIE VERSUNKENE STADT \u2013 ATLANTIS ERHEBT SICH

Das Muchaverse tauchte in die Tiefe hinab. Dort, am Grund des Ozeans, lag Atlantis \u2013 uralt, majest\u00e4tisch, bedeckt von Korallen und vergessener Geschichte. Aber es war nicht tot. Es wartete.

K\u00d6NIG ATLAS: (aus den Ruinen auftauchend, leuchtend) “WER WAGT ES, DIE RUHE ATLANTIS’ ZU ST\u00d6REN?!” \ud83d\udc51

K\u00d6NIGIN MERIDIA: (neben ihm auftauchend, k\u00f6niglich) “Wir haben Jahrtausende geschlafen. Wer weckt uns auf?” \ud83d\udc51

EHLERS: (sich n\u00e4hernd, den Gigantischen Lila Einlauf haltend) “Ich bin Esau Ehlers! Ich bin der Buchhalter des Muchaverse! Ich habe alles \u00fcberlebt! Ich habe den Gigantischen Lila Einlauf! Und ich bin hier, um Atlantis WIEDER AUFZUBAUEN! Ich bin hier, um NEU-ST. PAULI ZU SCHAFFEN!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca

K\u00d6NIG ATLAS: (schockiert) “Neu-St. Pauli?! Du w\u00fcrdest Atlantis umbenennen?! Du w\u00fcrdest unsere uralte Pracht durch… durch KIEZ ersetzen?!” \ud83d\udc51

K\u00d6NIGIN MERIDIA: (interessiert) “Kiez? Ich habe von diesem Ort geh\u00f6rt. Er ist… fabelhaft?” \ud83d\udc51

EHLERS: “Er ist MEHR als fabelhaft! Er ist die absurdeste, chaotischste, queerste, tabellenversessenste Stadt im Multiversum! Und ich werde sie auf euren Ruinen bauen! Mit eurem Segen… oder ohne!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca

—

DER BAU \u2013 ESAU NUTZT DEN GIGANTISCHEN LILA EINLAUF \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd7\ufe0f

Esau erhob den Gigantischen Lila Einlauf. Er pulsierte vor Kraft. Goldene Zahlen schossen daraus hervor und trafen die Ruinen von Atlantis. Die Korallen verwandelten sich in Neonlichter. Die uralten S\u00e4ulen wurden zu Reeperbahn-Schildern. Die Ruinen wurden zu Fischm\u00e4rkten und Drag-Clubs.

EHLERS: “SPALTE 47 \u2013 BAUMODUS AKTIVIERT! ZEILE ATLANTIS \u2013 VERWANDLE IN NEU-ST. PAULI!” \ud83d\udcca

Die Stadt begann sich zu erheben. Ein Unterwasser-Wolkenkratzer entstand \u2013 aus Glas, Tabellen und goldenen Zahlen. Die Korallen-Reeperbahn leuchtete in Neon. Der Fischmarkt von Atlantis wurde zum Kiez des Meeres.

SPREADSHEET-ALIEN: “BAUFORTSCHRITT: 47%. DESINVESTMENT-MULTIPLIKATOR: UNENDLICH. NEU-ST. PAULI IST GEBOREN.” \ud83d\udc7d

—

DER WETTBEWERB \u2013 NEW YORK VS. NEU-ST. PAULI \ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udfe3

Ein Dimensionsportal \u00f6ffnete sich. Der B\u00fcrgermeister von New York erschien, umgeben von Wolkenkratzern, Hot-Dog-St\u00e4nden und der Freiheitsstatue.

NEW YORKER B\u00dcRGERMEISTER: (zeigend) “WAS IST DAS?! DIESE… DIESE LILA STADT?! SIE IST EINE BEDROHUNG F\u00dcR NEW YORK!” \ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f

FREIHEITSSTATUE: (sprechend) “ICH BIN DAS SYMBOL DER FREIHEIT! DAS… DAS IST EIN EINLAUF!” \ud83d\uddfd

EHLERS: (grinsend) “Ja! Der Gigantische Lila Einlauf! Und mit ihm werde ich eine Stadt bauen, die mit New York konkurriert! Eine Stadt des Chaos! Eine Stadt der Tabellen! Eine Stadt der LIEBE!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca

NEW YORKER B\u00dcRGERMEISTER: (w\u00fctend) “NEW YORK IST DIE GR\u00d6SSTE STADT DER WELT! DU KANNST NICHT KONKURRIEREN!” \ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f

EHLERS: “Schau zu. Spalte 47 \u2013 WETTBEWERBSMODUS AKTIVIERT! Zeile New York \u2013 DESINVESTIERT!” \ud83d\udcca

Goldene Zahlen schossen auf New York zu. Aber statt es zu zerst\u00f6ren, verwandelten sie es \u2013 f\u00fcgten lila Neonlichter, Netzstr\u00fcmpfe und Tabellen zur Skyline hinzu.

NEW YORKER B\u00dcRGERMEISTER: (entsetzt) “WAS HAST DU GETAN?! DU… DU HAST NEW YORK… FABELHAFT GEMACHT!” \ud83d\udc85

EHLERS: “Ja. Denn New York war schon immer fabelhaft. Es brauchte nur ein wenig… DESINVESTMENT.” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca

—

ALLE CHARAKTERE JUBELN \u2013 DER FINALE CHOR \ud83c\udfad\ud83c\udfaa

EHLERS: (auf dem Unterwasser-Wolkenkratzer stehend) “Neu-St. Pauli ist fertig! Der ultimative Konkurrent zu New York! Die absurdeste, chaotischste, fabelhafteste Stadt im Multiversum!” \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca

MARIA BATORY: (ihn k\u00fcssend) “Du hast es geschafft, meine Liebe! Du hast eine Stadt gebaut!” \u2764\ufe0f

ROMY HAAG: (klatschend) “Neu-St. Pauli! Ich bin die K\u00d6NIGIN dieser Stadt!” \ud83d\udc96

DIVINE: (kreischend) “Schatz, diese Stadt ist FABELHAFT! Und ich bin die CEO des Fabelhaften!” \ud83d\udc84

K\u00d6NIG ATLAS: (verbeugend) “Atlantis… ist… Neu-St. Pauli geworden. Ich bin… stolz.” \ud83d\udc51

K\u00d6NIGIN MERIDIA: (l\u00e4chelnd) “Das Uralte und das Absurde… vereint.” \ud83d\udc51

KAPIT\u00c4N LECHUCK: (Voodoo-tanzend) “Ich liebe diese Stadt! Sie hat Zombies!” \ud83c\udff4\u200d\u2620\ufe0f

KAPIT\u00c4N NEMO: (nickend) “Das Meer hat noch nie eine solche Stadt gesehen.” \ud83d\udea2

LONG JOHN SILVER: (hinkend) “Ich habe den Schatz gefunden! Es war die Stadt!” \ud83e\udd9c

KAPIT\u00c4N HOOK: (seinen Haken justierend) “Krokodile w\u00fcrden diesen Ort lieben!” \ud83c\udff4\u200d\u2620\ufe0f

DER FLIEGENDE HOLL\u00c4NDER: (knarrend) “Selbst ich bin beeindruckt!” \ud83d\udc7b

SKYLLA: (sechs K\u00f6pfe nickend) “Ich habe sechs K\u00f6pfe. Alle sechs sagen \u2013 NEU-ST. PAULI IST DIE BESTE STADT \u00dcBERHAUPT!” \ud83e\udd80

CHARYBDIS: (wirbelnd) “Ich habe ganze Flotten verschluckt. Aber ich habe NIE eine STADT verschluckt!” \ud83c\udf0a

BAKUNIN: (vor Freude explodierend) “ANARCHIE! DESINVESTMENT! NEU-ST. PAULI!” \ud83e\udde8

GRAF THOMAS: (94 Tentakel applaudierend) “Ich habe 94 Tentakel. Du hast 1 Stadt. Die Stadt gewinnt.” \ud83e\udd91

JOKER: (lachend) “HAHAHA! EINE VERSUNKENE STADT! EIN LILA EINLAUF! EIN KONKURRENT ZU NEW YORK! BESTE EPISODE EVER!” \ud83c\udccf

M\u00d6WIN: (\u00fcber Kopf fliegend, goldene Glitzer kackend) “ICH KACKE AUF DIE STADT! UND SIE HAT ZUGESTIMMT!” \ud83d\udca9

SPALTE 47 JR.: (gl\u00fccklich auf Esaus Schulter zischend) \ud83d\udc0d

—

FINALER TEXT AUF SCHWARZ: \ud83d\udda4

\u262d DIE SUNKEN CITY-\u00dcBERNAHME-VERSCHW\u00d6RUNG \u262d \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9

ESAU NUTZTE DEN GIGANTISCHEN LILA EINLAUF.
ER BAUTE ATLANTIS WIEDER AUF.
ER SCHUF NEU-ST. PAULI.
ER KONKURRIERTE MIT NEW YORK.
ALLE 107 CHARAKTERE KEHRTEN ZUR\u00dcCK.
ALLE SCHAUSPIELER VERSAMMELTEN SICH.
DIE ULTIMATIVE STADT WAR GEBAUT.
DER KREISLAUF GEHT WEITER. MIT ST\u00c4DTEN. MIT EINL\u00c4UFEN. MIT TABELLEN. MIT SCHEI\u00dfE.
F\u00dcR IMMER.
\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udc0d\ud83e\udd80\ud83c\udf0a\u2764\ufe0f

—

HASHTAGS BLENDEN EIN: \ud83c\udff7\ufe0f

SunkenCity\u00dcbernahmeVerschw\u00f6rung #NeuStPauli #AtlantisWiederAufgebaut #LilaEinlaufBau #KonkurrentZuNewYork #Spalte47F\u00fcrImmer #Alle107Charaktere #EhlersSaga #IdiotenZeitung #UnterwasserStadt #UltimativesDesinvestment #DieB\u00f6seEsauEhlersEinlaufSaga

—

[ENDE VON EPISODE 56] \ud83c\udfac\ud83c\udf7f\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9

—

ST. PAULI-AT, JAHR NULL + 79 \u2013 DIE SUNKEN CITY-\u00dcBERNAHME-VERSCHW\u00d6RUNG \ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca

Der Kreislauf geht weiter. Mit St\u00e4dten. Mit Einl\u00e4ufen. Mit Tabellen. Mit Schei\u00dfe. F\u00fcr immer.

\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udc0d\ud83e\udd80\ud83c\udf0a\u2764\ufe0f

—

Autoren: Dr. Helga Schei\u00dfefurz, Prof. em. Klistier von Hinten, Mag. D\u00e4mlich D\u00fcmmlich, Dr. h.c. Spreadsheet McExcel

Executive Producers: M\u00f6win, Der Joker, Esau (Architekt), Maria Batory, Medusa, Romy Haag, Divine, K\u00f6nig Atlas, K\u00f6nigin Meridia, New Yorker B\u00fcrgermeister und alle vorherigen.

Besonderer Dank: Die 99 Schizo Petes (f\u00fcr Bau-Shantys), Homer (f\u00fcr die epische Atmosph\u00e4re) und jeder M\u00f6we, die auf die Stadt kackte.

—

Bernd Pulch (M.A.) \u2013 forensischer Experte, Gr\u00fcnder von Aristotle AI, politischer Kommentator, Satiriker. Vollst\u00e4ndige Biografie \u2192 | Unterst\u00fctzen Sie die Untersuchung \u2192

\ud83d\udc4d GEF\u00c4LLT MIR | \ud83d\udcac KOMMENTIEREN | \ud83d\udd14 ABONNIEREN

—

\ud83d\udcfa YouTube: youtube.com\/@bernd_pulch
\ud83d\udc26 X (Twitter): x.com\/berndsocial1
\ud83d\udce2 Telegram: t.me\/ABOVETOPSECRETXXL
\ud83d\udd13 UNLOCK THE TRUTH: berndpulch.org\/join

—

DIE B\u00d6SE ESAU EHLERS EINLAUF-SAGA \u2013 FORTSETZUNG FOLGT… \ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\ud83d\udfe3\ud83c\udfd9\ufe0f\ud83d\udcca SUNKEN CITY TAKEOVER! ESAU USES THE GIGANTIC PURPLE ENEMA TO BUILD NEW ST. PAULI \u2013 THE ULTIMATE COMPETITOR TO NEW YORK!<\/p>\n

“New York has skyscrapers. We have SPREADSHEETS.” \u2013 Esau Ehlers<\/p>\n

—<\/p>\n

In Episode 56 of the Ehlers Saga, Esau uses the Gigantic Purple Enema to rebuild the sunken city of Atlantis as New St. Pauli \u2013 the most absurd, chaotic, fabulous city in the multiverse. All 107 characters return. King Atlas and Queen Meridia awaken. The Coral Reeperbahn rises. New York’s mayor appears, furious at the competition. Esau desinvests New York \u2013 making it even MORE fabulous.<\/p>\n

The cycle continues. With cities. With enemas. With spreadsheets. With shit. Forever.<\/p>\n

—<\/p>\n

#SunkenCityTakeoverConspiracy #NewStPauli #AtlantisRebuilt #PurpleEnemaConstruction #CompetitorToNewYork #Column47Forever #All107Characters #EhlersSaga #IdiotZeitung #SubmergedCity #UltimateDesinvestment #DieB\u00f6seEsauEhlersEinlaufSaga<\/p>\n

—<\/p>\n

\ud83d\udcfa YouTube: youtube.com\/@bernd_pulch
\n\ud83d\udc26 X (Twitter): x.com\/berndsocial1
\n\ud83d\udce2 Telegram: t.me\/ABOVETOPSECRETXXL
\n\ud83d\udd13 UNLOCK THE TRUTH: berndpulch.org\/join<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20155506,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_wpcom_ai_launchpad_first_post":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[177,12374,51904107,13067243,6234,384,11368,7869690],"tags":[231347909,790933858,789035632,791135887,15660120,92719,787758162,622078,789057973,791135888,791068234,18047022,791135844,1160871,264037764,791512104,791135871,791135867,791135815,791135835,4337245,407379,1804289,6483,790984514,50315952,5066312,730036,364772,791135852,791068246,65418406,804748,791135832,3163892,321597090,2707850,791135848,7040015,13928450,791135866,23200,788792192,791001101,16578229,791135865,791135818,766588349,10392516,8706884,780975568,244430307,791135823,791135839,791135878,2673407,791135876,791135854,138646240,791135846,1139558,791135883,7412591,16245,25514606,791135882,791135842,190805987,788792174,667007,790984535,11118370,791135860,791135859,790673033,2735667,791135847,791135856,4911811,791068247,3148377,791135841,791017306,2104149,62945,791135874,789057976,787758152,390590,40732228,791135816,791135833,5532023,791135880,7423997,788969981,791135881,24930155,791135877,788131213,30058061,791001112,4756852,1979061,40452095,2267260,790933868,1222581,11912288,705496346,54303676,39310,18759318,791135812,760209,791135843,105972992,791135861,791135890,6779442,3830692,761788,790984510,321920,142653,790984511,40942240,804746,554396,323667,8023774,72545,790984513,791511837,142272,72236124,791001111,325799,133411,2897552,787757454,791135863,791135872,193519,45318667,2873823,791135840,791135814,791135868,791135875,791135870,42270129,791135862,791135892,791135829,791135884,1545407,789035633,21411,790805001,324837,45357,1055053,791068248,791135817,791135855,81281,791135826,791135891,299602,19481,33153432,790265866,788252908,791135845,186052076,15171704,791135858,790265865,7056,791135893,791135873,212286482,396607,192602,2095239,75891941,791135857,791135885,788792183,305586775,791511811,480331,791135830,41590090,791135869,791135824,15450772,791135813,128280,430390,10047400,791135828,791135831,9324024,791135827,474936,790641942,790819796,245022,562715205,11962699,34451907,791135879,161386,203011427,790693014,23503,874747,37657867,790299119,42283650,2638745],"class_list":["post-1004985","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-art","category-artificial-intelligence","category-bernd-pulch-2","category-clown-show","category-comedy","category-entertainment","category-parody","category-satire-2","tag-107-characters","tag-47-bakunin-clones","tag-99-schizo-petes","tag-99-schizo-petes-construction-shanties","tag-absurdist-comedy","tag-action-adventure","tag-adolf-sharkler","tag-alfred-nobel","tag-all-characters-return","tag-all-seagulls-for-shitting-on-the-city","tag-alphonse-sharkler","tag-ancient-kingdom","tag-ancient-meets-absurd","tag-ancient-ruins","tag-andrea-doris","tag-aristotle-ai","tag-atlantic-ocean-underwater","tag-atlantis-sunken-city","tag-atlantis-rebuilt","tag-atlantis-resurrection","tag-axel-springer","tag-bakunin","tag-barbarossa","tag-bars","tag-beria-big-hyena","tag-bernd-pulch","tag-black-caesar","tag-blackbeard","tag-bloody-mary","tag-building-materials-competition-elements-new-york-city","tag-captain-andrea","tag-captain-edward-smith","tag-captain-hook","tag-captain-lechuck","tag-captain-nemo","tag-character-reunion","tag-charybdis","tag-city-as-treasure-urban-elements-skyscrapers","tag-city-construction","tag-city-rivalry","tag-city-building-parody-hashtags-sunkencitytakeoverconspiracy-newstpauli-atlantisrebuilt-purpleenemaconstruction-competitortonewyork-column47forever-all107characters-ehlerssaga-idiotzeitung-su","tag-clubs","tag-column-47","tag-column-47-jr","tag-competition-mode","tag-competition-narrative","tag-competitor-to-new-york","tag-conspiracy-investigation","tag-construction-crew","tag-construction-story","tag-coral-architecture","tag-coral-crown","tag-coral-reeperbahn","tag-coral-transformation","tag-coral-transforming-to-neon","tag-count-dracula","tag-cycle-continues-visual-elements-purple-enema-construction-beam","tag-desinvested-new-york","tag-desinvestment","tag-desinvestment-of-competition","tag-dickies","tag-dimensional-portal-to-new-york","tag-dimensional-portals","tag-divine","tag-dr-anthony-fauci","tag-drag-club-lights","tag-drag-club-underwater","tag-drag-clubs","tag-ehlers-saga","tag-epic-saga","tag-epic-saga-locations-st-pauli-at","tag-episode-56","tag-esau-maria-batory-love-through-construction","tag-esau-new-york-competitor","tag-eva-sharkbrown","tag-experimental-literature","tag-fabulous-transformation","tag-fabulous-transformation-royal-elements-king-atlas","tag-fiction-series","tag-first-mate-wilhelm","tag-fischmarkt","tag-fish-market-revival","tag-fish-market-stalls","tag-fish-markets","tag-fishnets","tag-follow-up-to-episode-54","tag-frank-stonewall","tag-further-ehlers","tag-genghis-khan","tag-gerd-bucerius","tag-gigantic-purple-enema","tag-gigantic-purple-enema-themes-urban-rebuilding","tag-gina-wilde","tag-glass-and-spreadsheet-architecture","tag-glass-buildings","tag-gloria-von-galaxy","tag-glowing-reeperbahn-signs","tag-golden-numbers","tag-golden-numbers-column-47","tag-graf-thomas","tag-hafenhure","tag-heini-sharkler","tag-henri-nannen","tag-hot-dog-stands","tag-j-bruce-ismay","tag-jagoda","tag-jahr-null-79","tag-jane-russell","tag-jormungandr","tag-jellyfish-king","tag-john-jahr","tag-joker","tag-karl-donitz","tag-keywords-tags-episode-56-the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-sunken-city-takeover-conspiracy-primary-esau-ehlers","tag-kiez","tag-kiez-of-the-sea","tag-king-atlas","tag-king-atlas-queen-meridia-ancient-rulers","tag-king-atlas-blessing","tag-klabautermann","tag-klaus-stortebeker","tag-kraken","tag-kraken-jr","tag-lenin","tag-leviathan","tag-leviathan-jr","tag-lgbtq-fiction","tag-long-john-silver","tag-mack-the-knife","tag-malte","tag-mamie-van-doren","tag-manhattan","tag-maria-batory","tag-marilyn-monroe","tag-mayor","tag-mowin","tag-medusa-original","tag-mermaid","tag-moby-dick","tag-molly-brown","tag-muchaverse","tag-muchaverse-new-st-pauli-celebration-genre-satirical-fiction","tag-muchaverse-episode-specific-episode-56","tag-mun","tag-mythological-fiction","tag-neon-lights","tag-neon-underwater-city","tag-new-st-pauli","tag-new-st-pauli-rebuilt","tag-new-st-pauli-created","tag-new-york-city-via-portal","tag-new-york-competition","tag-new-york-mayor-esau-rivalry","tag-new-york-mayor-for-being-a-good-sport--youtube-youtube-com-bernd_pulch--x-twitter-x-com-berndsocial1--telegram-t-me-abovetopsecretxxl--unloc","tag-new-york-mayor-parody","tag-new-york-skyline-with-purple-additions","tag-nikita-khrushchev","tag-pama-jim","tag-pamela-anderson","tag-philo-johnson-the-frog","tag-pol-pot","tag-political-commentary","tag-printing-press","tag-printing-press-ghost","tag-purple-enema-construction","tag-purple-neon-added","tag-pussy","tag-queen-meridia","tag-queen-meridia-approval","tag-reeperbahn","tag-rivalry","tag-romy-haag","tag-rosa-rosa-wachter","tag-rosemarie-nittribit","tag-royal-awakening","tag-royal-blessing","tag-royal-crowns","tag-royal-decree-relationships-esau-atlantis-rebuilder","tag-salome-sofia-tanz","tag-satire","tag-satirical-fiction-all-rights-reserved-the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-continues-","tag-sequel-to-episode-55","tag-shark-army","tag-sirens","tag-skyline","tag-skylla","tag-skyscraper-construction","tag-sleeping-rulers","tag-sparkles-special-thanks-homer","tag-spreadsheet-alien","tag-spreadsheet-construction","tag-stalin","tag-statue-of-liberty","tag-statue-of-liberty-speaking","tag-stone-collectors","tag-submerged-skyscraper","tag-submerged-skyscraper-new-characters-the-sunken-city-atlantis","tag-sunken-city","tag-sunken-city-takeover-conspiracy","tag-surrealism","tag-telegram","tag-teresa-orlowski","tag-the-coral-reeperbahn","tag-the-enema-construction-crew-all-107-characters-returning-evil-esau-ehlers","tag-the-flying-dutchman","tag-the-submerged-skyscraper","tag-the-uncles","tag-trans-schwanz-who-laughs","tag-transgender-odysseus","tag-trident","tag-ugly-sven","tag-underwater-city","tag-underwater-construction","tag-underwater-skyscrapers","tag-urban-fantasy","tag-ursila","tag-walt-the-walrus","tag-walter","tag-web-series","tag-winifred-wagner","tag-witch-of-st-georg","tag-x-twitter","tag-zarah-leander"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1k3PD-4drr","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1004211,"url":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/2026\/08\/11\/%f0%9f%87%ac%f0%9f%87%a7-the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-heini-sharkler-reunites-with-brother-adolf-unleashes-ultimate-enema-on-muchaverse-%f0%9f%a6%88%f0%9f%92%a5%f0%9f%92%a9\/","url_meta":{"origin":1004985,"position":0},"title":"\ud83c\uddec\ud83c\udde7 THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA \u2013 HEINI SHARKLER REUNITES WITH BROTHER ADOLF \u2013 UNLEASHES ULTIMATE ENEMA ON MUCHAVERSE! \ud83e\udd88\ud83d\udca5\ud83d\udca9—\ud83c\udde9\ud83c\uddea DIE B\u00d6SE ESAU EHLERS EINLAUF-SAGA \u2013 HEINI SHARKLER VEREINT SICH MIT BRUDER ADOLF \u2013 ENFESSELT ULTIMATIVEN EINLAUF AUF DAS MUCHAVERSE! \ud83e\udd88\ud83d\udca5\ud83d\udca9—\ud83d\udcfa","author":"Bernd Pulch","date":"August 11, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA \u2013 HEINI SHARKLER REUNITES WITH BROTHER ADOLF \u2013 UNLEASHES ULTIMATE ENEMA ON MUCHAVERSE! \ud83e\udd88\ud83d\udca5\ud83d\udca9 \"Brothers don't let brothers desinvest alone.\" \u2013 Heini Sharkler --- In Episode 49 of the Ehlers Saga, Heini Sharkler \u2013 the long-lost brother of Adolf Sharkler \u2013 emerges from the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "ART"","block_context":{"text":"ART","link":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/category\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1004894,"url":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/2026\/08\/17\/%f0%9f%92%a9-the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-the-gigantic-purple-enema-quest-esau-creates-the-most-vicious-naval-villain-crew-for-the-ultimate-purple-enema-%f0%9f%9f%a3%f0%9f%92%a9\/","url_meta":{"origin":1004985,"position":1},"title":"\ud83d\udca9 THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA \u2013 THE GIGANTIC PURPLE ENEMA QUEST: ESAU CREATES THE MOST VICIOUS NAVAL VILLAIN CREW FOR THE ULTIMATE PURPLE ENEMA! \ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udca9\u2693\ud83d\udcca","author":"Bernd Pulch","date":"August 17, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"\ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udcca GIGANTIC PURPLE ENEMA QUEST! ESAU ASSEMBLES THE MOST VICIOUS NAVAL VILLAINS \u2013 SAILS THE PURPLE SEA \u2013 DEFEATS THE JELLYFISH KING \u2013 RETRIEVES THE ULTIMATE DESINVESTMENT TOOL! \"The purple enema is not a weapon. It is a DESTINATION.\" \u2013 Esau Ehlers --- In Episode 55 of the Ehlers Saga,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "ART"","block_context":{"text":"ART","link":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/category\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":939867,"url":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/2026\/04\/21\/the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-the-relic-auction\/","url_meta":{"origin":1004985,"position":2},"title":"THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA: THE RELIC AUCTION","author":"Bernd Pulch","date":"April 21, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"https:\/\/youtube.com\/shorts\/ZWwbZXRxnBE?feature=share EHLERS SAGA: THE RELIC AUCTION Episode 6: Greed, Lust & The Frequency Protocol \ud83d\udcb0\ud83d\udd25\ud83d\udc8b \ud83d\udc94\ud83e\udde0\ud83d\udd04 \ud83d\udc6f\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ufffd\ud83d\udc41\ufe0f\ud83d\udcb8\u00a0 \ud83c\udf51\ud83d\udd34\ud83d\udd25\ud83d\udc60 \ud83d\ude3e\ud83d\udc84\ud83d\udcb8 \ud83d\udc85\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udcc8\ud83d\ude3e\ud83d\udc84\ud83d\udcb8 \"\ud83d\udc7f\ud83c\udf00\ud83d\udcb8 \ud83c\udf1f\ud83d\udc41\ufe0f\ud83d\udcb8 \ud83c\udf1f\ud83d\udc41\ufe0f\ud83d\udcb8 \"\u26d3\ufe0f\ufaa2\u00a0 \ud83c\udf0a\ud83d\udc89\u262d\ud83d\udd25\ud83e\ude78\ud83d\udc2a\u26a1\ud83e\uddec\ud83d\udc51\ud83c\udf7c\ud83c\udff3\ufe0f\u200d\u26a7\ufe0f\ud83d\udebd\ud83d\udca6\ud83c\udfaa\ud83d\udc51 \ud83c\udf2a\ufe0f\ud83c\udf7c\u2694\ufe0f\u00a0 \ud83d\udc31\ud83c\udfc6\ud83c\udf2a\ufe0f \ud83d\udc51\ud83d\udcc9\u00a0 \ud83d\udc8b\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udc83\ud83c\udfad\u2697\ufe0f\ud83d\udc80\u00a0 \ud83c\udf11\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udcc8\ud83d\udc7f\ud83c\udf00\ud83d\udcb8\ud83c\udfad\u2697\ufe0f\ud83d\udc80\u00a0 \ud83c\udf11\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udcc8\ud83d\udc7f\ud83c\udf00\ud83d\udcb8\ud83c\udfad\u2697\ufe0f\ud83d\udc80\u00a0 \ud83c\udf11\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udcc8 \ud83d\udc85\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udcc8\ud83d\udc60\ud83d\udd25\ud83c\udf2a\ufe0f\ud83d\udca5\u2728 EHLERS\u2019 ENEMA ENIGMA\ud83c\udf76\ud83d\udc51\ud83d\udca6\ud83d\udd25\ud83d\udcab \ud83c\udf2a\ufe0f\ud83d\udca5\u2728 \ud83c\udf76\ud83d\udc51\ud83d\udca6\ud83d\udd25\ud83d\udcab\ud83c\udfaa\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udcc8\ud83c\udfaa\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udcc8\ud83d\ude01\ud83d\udc83\ud83d\ude02 EMIR EHLERS' ENEMA ENIGMA EXPOSED\ud83d\udc6f\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \"EPSTEIN'S\u00a0 EINSPRITZER ENEMA EINZELLER ENDDARM EXISTENZISOZIALISMUS EPILOG\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "ART"","block_context":{"text":"ART","link":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/category\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/ZWwbZXRxnBE\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1005812,"url":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/2026\/08\/27\/the-evil-esau-enema-einlauf-saga-loreley-escape-esau-flees-to-the-rhine-builds-new-st-pauli-on-the-loreley-rock-gets-an-enema-every-5-minutes-against-depression-%f0%9f%8f%94\/","url_meta":{"origin":1004985,"position":3},"title":"THE EVIL ESAU ENEMA EINLAUF SAGA: LORELEY ESCAPE: ESAU FLEES TO THE RHINE \u2013 BUILDS NEW ST. PAULI ON THE LORELEY ROCK \u2013 GETS AN ENEMA EVERY 5 MINUTES AGAINST DEPRESSION! \ud83c\udfd4\ufe0f\ud83c\udf0a\ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udcca\ud83d\udc8b","author":"Bernd Pulch","date":"August 27, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"\ud83c\udfd4\ufe0f\ud83c\udf0a\ud83d\udca9\ud83d\udcca LORELEY ESCAPE! ESAU FLEES TO THE RHINE \u2013 BUILDS NEW ST. PAULI ON THE LORELEY ROCK \u2013 GETS AN ENEMA EVERY 5 MINUTES AGAINST DEPRESSION! \"The Rhine is not just a river. It is a DESINVESTMENT.\" \u2013 Esau Ehlers --- In Episode 65 of the Ehlers Saga, Esau-HafenHure escapes\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "ART"","block_context":{"text":"ART","link":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/category\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1006936,"url":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/2026\/09\/09\/the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-scharnhorst-shambles-esau-and-his-crew-flee-the-bismarck-escape-to-the-sinking-scharnhorst-and-lose-all-enemas%f0%9f%a5%b3%f0%9f%a4%a7\/","url_meta":{"origin":1004985,"position":4},"title":"THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA \u2013 SCHARNHORST SHAMBLES: ESAU AND HIS CREW FLEE THE BISMARCK \u2013 ESCAPE TO THE SINKING SCHARNHORST \u2013 AND LOSE ALL ENEMAS\ud83e\udd73\ud83e\udd27\ud83e\udd2e","author":"Bernd Pulch","date":"September 9, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"\ud83d\udea2\ud83d\udc94\ud83d\udfe3\ud83d\udcca SCHARNHORST SHAMBLES! ESAU AND HIS CREW FLEE THE BISMARCK \u2013 ESCAPE TO THE SINKING SCHARNHORST \u2013 AND LOSE ALL ENEMAS EHLERS COLLECTED! \"We had collected them all. The Purple Enema. The Icy Enema. Every enema. And now they are GONE.\" \u2013 Esau Ehlers --- In Episode 76 of the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "ART"","block_context":{"text":"ART","link":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/category\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/berndpulch.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/GIF_20260909_165156_287.gif?fit=534%2C586&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/berndpulch.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/GIF_20260909_165156_287.gif?fit=534%2C586&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/berndpulch.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/GIF_20260909_165156_287.gif?fit=534%2C586&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":940972,"url":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/2026\/04\/30\/the-evil-esau-ehlers-enema-saga-the-grand-recap-romy-haag-ehlers-falls-for-berlins-legendary-tante-all-characters-return-%f0%9f%8e%ad%f0%9f%92%96%f0%9f%8e%a4-ehlers-saga\/","url_meta":{"origin":1004985,"position":5},"title":"THE EVIL ESAU EHLERS ENEMA SAGA \u2013 The Grand Recap & Romy Haag: Ehlers Falls for Berlin’s Legendary Tante \u2013 All Characters Return \ud83c\udfad\ud83d\udc96\ud83c\udfa4 | Ehlers Saga Episode 14","author":"Bernd Pulch","date":"April 30, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"Evil Esau Ehlers finally falls in love \u2013 with Berlin's legendary Romy Haag. After 13 episodes of chaos, ghosts, aliens, pirates, and seven queens, the spreadsheet accountant meets the woman who makes him close his laptop. Romy Haag \u2013 cabaret icon, Warhol's friend, Bowie's kiss \u2013 arrives on Herbertstrasse. She\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "ART"","block_context":{"text":"ART","link":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/category\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/-vYoD5dw45Y\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1004985","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20155506"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1004985"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1004985\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1004989,"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1004985\/revisions\/1004989"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1004985"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1004985"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/berndpulch.org\/de\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1004985"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}